1. If you get too hot you are actually getting less bang for your buck because you can destroy the good stuff. I've had my SSV for a couple of years now, and the whip still makes me cough. I use it almost exclusively with a bong, and I can take huge rips. Feels sooooo smooth. Night and day.
2. For me, any vape combined with a bong is better, but I do agree that it sacrifices some flavor, not it a bad way, in an it tastes like regular air way. I can take giant hits and hold them forever tho. Mastering tokins method of holding it, releasing a little, inhaling, repeat makes a difference too. Check this out :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MuUiZabtrQc
Even tokin coughs
3. It's all about the results. I like my ABV to be a light to medium brown, so I set the dial at whatever spot gets that done for me. I start low, and crank it up a little at a time till the bowls done. I've found there is no sweet spot, and even if you do find one it will change over time. I don't know about you, but the heating element can move a little bit up or down, and that will change your temps. I broke my original heater cover, and the new one's intake hole(the lower hole under the hot part of the heating element) was lower than on my original heater cover, changing where I'd set my dial. Once you get this heating method down, it becomes second nature and you don't even really think about it. Start low, crank it up as you go.
Hey, that rhymed.
As far as extracting the most, be comfortable leaving a little bit of goodies in the bud. Save the weed you've already vaped, also called ABV(already been vaped) or duff or AVB(already vaped bud), and cook with it or make green dragon or hash or whatever. I love to make brownies using ABV and coconut oil instead of vegetable oil. I actually prefer ABV edibles, they tend to be mellower than regular edibles, which I like.
Leaving some goodness in your ABV also ensures you aren't getting into the high temp ranges that can destroy THC and lead to combustion.
Let us know how it goes.
Afterthought-Happycamper, I just read your post, looks like we have some common themes. Great minds thinkin alike.