VaporsVaporizer
On the Stoop
Talk to us after your first prep if you don't use the ointment
Imagine eating a hundred Taco bell taco's 
Fuck you !!!
- Thread starter lwien
- Start date
Imagine eating a hundred Taco bell taco's 
lwien
Well-Known Member
Imagine eating a hundred Taco bell taco's
Yup, that's exactly what it felt like. And then, when you wipe yourself with toilet paper, it might as well be fucking sand paper.
Not going to happen this time. Got tubes of Destin and Baby Wipes along with some Depends for the ride there. Now all I need is a pacifier and a fucking crib.
Dreamerr
Always in a state of confusion and silliness♀
You guys fuckin' crack me up. You want to fuck woman in the ass but you are afraid to use a little lube on your delicate assholes. Oh my fuck with you babies. Zinc oxide, desitin, a and d any of that stuff is great to help with burning. The colonoscopy is not a big deal at all except if you are a para like me and the drink doesn't work. Anyhow I am not sure mirilax is strong enough cause many take that daily as I do. Now suck it up and take your damn drink gross as it is, shit your brains out and go have the tube up your ass which you won't even know about. Tweek you should be used to it by now.
Go out after and fuck soft food...I had chicken parm with baked ziti as I do when I am in recovery from all the times I was under and they laugh at me. A big Italian meal in recovery does me good...take those crackers and shove them up your colonoscopy ass.
Go out after and fuck soft food...I had chicken parm with baked ziti as I do when I am in recovery from all the times I was under and they laugh at me. A big Italian meal in recovery does me good...take those crackers and shove them up your colonoscopy ass.
lwien
Well-Known Member
LOL ^^ Yeah. We men are a bunch of wimps.
I had to have a cystoscope (a video camera shoved up your dick into your bladder) a few times (no anesthesia) along with a few prostate biopsies (my prostate is 15 times the size of a normal prostate) and I remember when I complained once because of the pain, one of the nurses just looked down at me and she said, "Man the fuck up. You guys have no fucking idea what real pain is. Try having a fucking baby, asshole". She said this with a smile and it had me laughing through the whole procedure. Great nurse. Fucking doctors were cracking up.
I had to have a cystoscope (a video camera shoved up your dick into your bladder) a few times (no anesthesia) along with a few prostate biopsies (my prostate is 15 times the size of a normal prostate) and I remember when I complained once because of the pain, one of the nurses just looked down at me and she said, "Man the fuck up. You guys have no fucking idea what real pain is. Try having a fucking baby, asshole". She said this with a smile and it had me laughing through the whole procedure. Great nurse. Fucking doctors were cracking up.
VaporsVaporizer
On the Stoop
Dreamerr, you use a whole bottle of Miralax for the prep , not a daily dose and if they take a bunch of fucking polyps out you better eat a soft diet for a few days if you are told to avoid avoid any intestinal perforations in the area's where the polyps were removed.
For the record, I have never wanted to fuck a woman in the ass. So don't paint us all with the same brush Dreamerr.
Dreamerr
Always in a state of confusion and silliness♀
Ah ok VV but if no polyps I still say go for it fuck I would go for it anyhow cause I am woman and pain is bs to us.
Like I said the prep didn't work on me so imagine the huge stomach ache I had with no relief...I curse the doc out the next day.
Like I said the prep didn't work on me so imagine the huge stomach ache I had with no relief...I curse the doc out the next day.
VaporsVaporizer
On the Stoop
Yes, i agree in most cases women handle pain better than men but an intestinal perforation requires immediate surgery so i listen when my Dr tells me soft food for a few days. At least i'm eating something 
.
I'm sure you did curse your Dr out!! I would have too.
Here are a few more tips on what foods etc to avoid a few days before the prep and some other good fucking info.
http://www.texasamphysicians.com/resources/miralax-prep-packet.pdf
but an intestinal perforation requires immediate surgery so i listen when my Dr tells me soft food for a few days. At least i'm eating something . I'm sure you did curse your Dr out!! I would have too.
Here are a few more tips on what foods etc to avoid a few days before the prep and some other good fucking info.
http://www.texasamphysicians.com/resources/miralax-prep-packet.pdf
Yes, i agree in most cases women handle pain better than men
I'm sure you did curse your Dr out!! I would have too.
Here are a few more tips on what foods etc to avoid a few days before the prep and some other good fucking info.
http://www.texasamphysicians.com/resources/miralax-prep-packet.pdf
I know of someone personally who had a relative die from having their intestine perforated during the procedure...it does have risks most def.
lwien
Well-Known Member
As does just about every medical procedure. It's all about the risk/reward ratio.
"The rate of perforation reported in large studies is 0.3% or less and is generally less than 0.1%."
--- http://www.asge.org/assets/0/71542/71544/56321364-c4d8-4742-8158-55b6bef2a568.pdf
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Yeah, part I left out was the risk/reward ratio where she got it done was great due to poor medical care. Her chances were more like 50%. So it varies by where you live.
Maybe we like to talk about ass probing? I hear it's all the rage with aliens.
lwien
Well-Known Member
Yeah, fuck all this colonoscopy shit!
Yeah..............fuck my ass. What? Wait. No, I didn't mean it that way. Really. I meant to say, "Fuck my ass", not, "Fuck my ass".
FUCK !!!!
(outta here >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> (poof) )
Seren
Away with the fairies
pmsl...well I'm glad we've cleared that one up! Fuck double entendres!!
poonman
Well-Known Member
Fuck you guys for making me read this during DINNER !
Agreed .
' It takes a Licking but keeps on Ticking '
Agreed .
' It takes a Licking but keeps on Ticking '
@VaporsVaporizer, fuck him, don't PM him any tips. He's wasting your time because obviously in that case a prep won't be needed.
Hoof Hearted
Vapesallday Industries
'Fuck You !!', insomnia.
I miss the days before I met your ugly ass.
I used to be able to enjoy 8-12 hour sleep sessions and take naps at will.
Now my nights are much different but that will soon change because I can't continue to live with you anymore ya fuckin punk!
I miss the days before I met your ugly ass.
I used to be able to enjoy 8-12 hour sleep sessions and take naps at will.
Now my nights are much different but that will soon change because I can't continue to live with you anymore ya fuckin punk!
dorkus_molorkus
Well-Known Member
Here is a massive FUCK YOU to the smartass who saw fit to tailgate me for a mile or so.
Sure I pulled off a slightly cheeky maneuver earlier, and I mean slightly.
I am a responsible driver & for the 99% of other retarded drivers it wouldnt have even registered.
Unfortunately, I got Mr Speedy Mcfuckface. Which is fine, I myself, am often the incarnation of Mr Speedy Mcfuckface.
BUT I CAN ONLY GO AS FAST AS THE CAR IN FRONT OF ME!!
Sitting on my ass for a mile or so does not make the elderly fuck I just gazumped you for go any faster.
I thought I had prepared my wife for the impending inertia difference we were about to experience when I uttered the fateful words 'Honey, this cocksucker is about to be our guest on the backseat'
and I jumped on the brakes.........................
Apparently Mrs Dorkus was not subsequently prepared for the inertia difference when the impending became the reality.
Woops my bad honey.
But the look on the fuckers face in the rear view as he shit his pants, hit the brakes & then speared off in the strip beside us was AWESOME!!
NOT SO FUCKEN SMART NOW ARE YOU DICKHEAD??
I drive a $1500 car with an insured value of $6k.
Feel free to tailgate me like an asshole anytime you like.
Oh, I imagine your Mrs nearly beat the shit out of you, or you realised that punching on with me while you got poop running down your leg wasnt going to be fun.
Wise move.
Have a nice day.
Sure I pulled off a slightly cheeky maneuver earlier, and I mean slightly.
I am a responsible driver & for the 99% of other retarded drivers it wouldnt have even registered.
Unfortunately, I got Mr Speedy Mcfuckface. Which is fine, I myself, am often the incarnation of Mr Speedy Mcfuckface.
BUT I CAN ONLY GO AS FAST AS THE CAR IN FRONT OF ME!!
Sitting on my ass for a mile or so does not make the elderly fuck I just gazumped you for go any faster.
I thought I had prepared my wife for the impending inertia difference we were about to experience when I uttered the fateful words 'Honey, this cocksucker is about to be our guest on the backseat'
and I jumped on the brakes.........................
Apparently Mrs Dorkus was not subsequently prepared for the inertia difference when the impending became the reality.
Woops my bad honey.
But the look on the fuckers face in the rear view as he shit his pants, hit the brakes & then speared off in the strip beside us was AWESOME!!
NOT SO FUCKEN SMART NOW ARE YOU DICKHEAD??
I drive a $1500 car with an insured value of $6k.
Feel free to tailgate me like an asshole anytime you like.
Oh, I imagine your Mrs nearly beat the shit out of you, or you realised that punching on with me while you got poop running down your leg wasnt going to be fun.
Wise move.
Have a nice day.
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Here is a massive FUCK YOU to the smartass who saw fit to tailgate me for a mile or so.
Sure I pulled off a slightly cheeky maneuver earlier, and I mean slightly.
I am a responsible driver & for the 99% of other retarded drivers it wouldnt have even registered.
Unfortunately, I got Mr Speedy Mcfuckface. Which is fine, I myself, am often the incarnation of Mr Speedy Mcfuckface.
BUT I CAN ONLY GO AS FAST AS THE CAR IN FRONT OF ME!!
Sitting on my ass for a mile or so does not make the elderly fuck I just gazumped you for go any faster.
I thought I had prepared my wife for the impending inertia difference we were about to experience when I uttered the fateful words 'Honey, this cocksucker is about to be our guest on the backseat'
and I jumped on the brakes.........................
Apparently Mrs Dorkus was not subsequently prepared for the inertia difference when the impending became the reality.
Woops my bad honey.
But the look on the fuckers face in the rear view as he shit his pants, hit the brakes & then speared off in the strip beside us was AWESOME!!
NOT SO FUCKEN SMART NOW ARE YOU DICKHEAD??
I drive a $1500 car with an insured value of $6k.
Feel free to tailgate me like an asshole anytime you like.
Oh, I imagine your Mrs nearly beat the shit out of you, or you realised that punching on with me while you got poop running down your leg wasnt going to be fun.
Wise move.
Have a nice day.
I've had a guy follow me for a good half hour, just because I almost accidentally hit his precious Mercedes while changing lanes. So I took him on a nice tour of the neighbourhood, all while he was screaming in the rearview mirror...pretty sure I saw him lip "Im going to kill you" but whatever. So yeah, fuck that guy too.
Then there was the other guy, who got out of his truck and came up to my window. Something spooked him though, because he looked at me and then walked away lol...I don't think I am all that intimidating, but I wasn't thrilled with what he was doing either, so maybe it showed?
Some people
Bob Loblaw
Astralnaut
knife pulled on me, twice.
not in l.a., or detroit, or philly, or jersey, but in the pacific nw, lol
not in l.a., or detroit, or philly, or jersey, but in the pacific nw, lol
It's like Mad Max out there, these days...I have personally witnessed individuals who will remain nameless, chase after other drivers with an axe, a crowbar, a hunk of wood and a brick level.