Joke thread

Ramahs

Fucking Combustion (mostly) Since February 2017
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Relaxed

This Space For Rent
A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."
What do they say?" the priest inquired.

They say, "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

"That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed; then he thought for a moment. You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. "Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Frank and Jacob.

My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time."

"Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage, holding rosary beads and praying.

Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.
After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison:
"Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

There was stunned silence. Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed,

"Put the beads away, Frank, our prayers have been answered!
 

Ramahs

Fucking Combustion (mostly) Since February 2017
A social worker, a Lawyer, and a Priest are on a sinking cruise ship.

The social worker turns to the other two and says "We have to save the children!!!"

The lawyer responds with "No, fuck the children!"

The priest then replies "Do you think we have time?"
 
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macbill

Oh No! Mr macbill!!
Staff member
A speaker was scheduled to talk to a large crowd His flight got canceled due to a huge storm. They found a Buddhist Monk in the audience and asked him to speak in his place.

He said ... instead of Panic Panic everything is out of control.... Relax Relax everything is out of control!


Breathe....
 
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