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Board shorts... how can buying these be so damn complicated?

Discussion in 'The Vapor Lounge' started by Caligula, Jul 13, 2014.

  1. Caligula

    Caligula Maximus

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    Okay, so my recent trip back to Hawaii reminded me that I need to update my island attire, especially since I'm going back in a few months. So far, I've already got some new slippers (aka flip-flops for mainlanders) so that leaves a few pairs of board shorts... and maybe a shirt. Maybe.

    Anyway, it appears that the boardshort market has gone high tech with bullshit pseudo scientific marketing terms and to make things worse i cant find a comprehensive guide for these things.

    As such, looking at the various brands, I see you can get all sorts of material and construction options. 2 way stretch, 4 way stretch, 30% stretch, 60% stretch, 120% stretch, welded seams, waterproofing coatings, compression undershorts... hell, one is even made with fucking recycled bamboo and is supposedly antimicrobial.

    Now this might not sound like a big deal until you realize that all the major brands have shorts ranging in price from $30 to over $120.

    Yes $120 for some swim trunks.

    So my question is WTF is marketing bunk and what is actually worth the premium price?

    I should also qualify this with a few things:

    • These need to be comfortable since I'll be living in them for weeks at a time.
    • Have to dry fast. Faster than standard polyester shorts.
    • I prefer no mesh liner.
    • Pocket is a must as this is also land wear.
    • Don't want them to cling to my junk like it's vacuum packed after I get out of the water
    • NO VELCRO FLY. God that's unpleasant when you have to pee and rub up against it.
    Anyway I figure there has to be some overlap with this community and the surfer/beach crowd so I figured I'd ask.

    Mahalo.
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2014
  2. stickstones

    stickstones Eccentric of mist Staff Member

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    Go ask for a pair of Birdwells and see if they have a clue. I miss them and haven't seen them since the 70's. But they fit your wish list perfectly.
     
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  3. aesthyrian

    aesthyrian Blaaaaah

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    Just get a speedo and be done with it! :brow:
     
  4. KidFated.

    KidFated. Watch your pawking metaws.

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    Oakleys.
     
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  5. Silver420Surfer

    Silver420Surfer Well-Known Member

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    Local Motion(Local Hawaiian, good selection, brand many locals wear)--None of my Local motion have the mesh netting you mentioned.

    Quicksilver--maybe the Amphibians to help dry fastest.

    Used to live on Maui, worked at the Hula Grill, married my wife there. I love Hawaii.
    Maui no ka 'oi!!!
     
  6. Vapour Clown

    Vapour Clown Hey Hey

    Messages:
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    Location:
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    +1 for Quiksilver quick drys, though I don't know if the American lineup is different to Australia. Since I was a youngster I've had at least two pairs of quikies in my closet.

    Lately though I've been wearing a brand called Hurley, dunno if you guys get 'em, but they're super comfy and have all of the attributes you're looking for.
     
  7. Mr. Gweilo 420

    Mr. Gweilo 420 Dude

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    Caligula are you a surfer? If not I don't think you need to worry so much. If you just want comfort just go for whatever you like. On the other hand if you are looking for something to optimise physical performance you may need to consider it more closely. Just my 2 cents :)
     
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  8. CarolKing

    CarolKing Singer of songs and a vapor connoisseur

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    left coast
    I really like Lands End products. They are very well made and some items are reasonably priced. I see they make a lot of products for men. Just check it out online. :2c:
     
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  9. photobooth

    photobooth Well-Known Member

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    I would recommend checking out LL Bean or J Crew as well, they tend to have high quality products and good customer service. Nothing super stylish but well made products.
     
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  10. 2clicker

    2clicker up to my ears in clams Accessory Maker

    Messages:
    3,671
    HUF, OBEY, the hundreds, 4square, Enjoi, brixton, DGK, diamond supply co, volcom... brands that i would look into

    HUF has a lot of cannabis related designs!
     
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  11. Silver420Surfer

    Silver420Surfer Well-Known Member

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    Location:
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    Nothing screams haole like LL Bean/J Crew in Hawaii--- jk lol

    I have a shop nearby called Nekton(i believe Cory/Shea Lopez own it). They carry almost every brand imaginable.
    Surf sucks here but you can look good while waiting with the sharks :lol:
     
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  12. stickstones

    stickstones Eccentric of mist Staff Member

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    8,513
    I'll say it again...

    http://www.bbbritches.us/

    Nothing dries quicker and they last forever. I'm not sure about velcro and pockets these days...you'll have to check the website.
     
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  13. Caligula

    Caligula Maximus

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    Hurley is big here seeing as how they are located in So Cal. I was actually looking at their Phantom line but I read reviews that the material gets kinda "sheer" when wet. I personally dont mind, but the wife and kids might be mortified if everyone can guess my religion as I get our of the water. Can you comment on this? I suppose I could always just opt for a darker color.

    Also I see under armour makes board shorts. I like this brand for other stuff. Anyone see these before?

    ROFL, my Mother's family's been Kama Ľaina (with some kanaka in there, but only through marriage) since the plantation days... and my skin looks it. I could probably get away with this. Not my style though, heh.

    @stickstones you got my attention, Im going to check it out right now. Sadly they dont have a lot of detail on the materials used, etc.
     
    Last edited: Jul 15, 2014
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  14. Vapour Clown

    Vapour Clown Hey Hey

    Messages:
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    Location:
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    @Caligula, I couldn't tell you if the lighter colours go sheer as I've only bought dark colours so far. I personally never get white or yellow boardies for this reason, as well as they stain easy.

    I will say that they're comfy enough for me to use as house shorts, even when I'm nowhere near a beach... Actually scratch that, I only live 200 yards away from the water. I'm always near the beach:brow:
     
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  15. Caligula

    Caligula Maximus

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  16. stickstones

    stickstones Eccentric of mist Staff Member

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    I was surprised they were even available at all...I just googled them yesterday. They were the Quicksilver of the 60's and 70's back when baggies were all one color. They may have been the only brand in the store at the time. Then quicksilver came out with patterns on cloth and it was all over (Birdwells are some sort of quick drying canvass shit that lasts forever). What got lost in the style revolution was the quick drying. I used to come out of the water with Birdwells and be completely dry in ten to fifteen minutes. I miss them and have thought about getting a pair a lot in the last ten years as I've gotten back to the beach. But they are pretty fucking expensive on that site of theirs. I will get one eventually, though, as there is too much history in Birdwells to ignore...
     
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  17. z9

    z9 Well-Known Member

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    742
    I typically wear Hurley or O'Neil board shorts when I'm out on the stand up and have always been happy with them. However recently I found a pair of board shorts at American Eagle for $20 and they're my new favorite pair, go figure. They don't dry as quickly as my others but the huge pockets and thickish, quality fabric is a fantastic. This is the only pair that I'd be comfortable using as shorts.
     
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