@cybrguy no doubt and agreed --I have n must agree -- about 2 sides --- n two huge extremes ---
no doubt as sick as it is we do need to be able be the LOUD voices for the children -- especially for abuse and yes addiction issues !
but as we are learning with MJ -- thank goodness we r proving there is a better way to handle situations that in the past put someone into jail or tore the life apart --- we need to change other areas
I have actually been on both sides --
@ first working close with law firms that were handling both sides of child cases --
and so many items were just so cut n dry ---- and I felt proud during that time as I saw a sad child in pain about to "hopefully" live a better life !(well -- was I TOLD about the sad child -- never saw the child in court) -----(and yes I was embarrassed n saddened many many times as the kids were taken away due to MJ and other small - imo - "issues" -- but I always felt even though the courts were making the wrong choice these parents will have the chance to "fix" it by fixing thur habits 4 a few months -- n the family was back together -- )
I just assumed that would happen --- I couldn't have been more wrong -
then I moved on with my career of course n years went by --- I started helping at local events to get donations to really help foster children and the homeless ....
*****(1st occasion of too many until I just had to stop)
now I happen to meet some local foster families at a local charity event --- and I learned so much more ---
At any given time in the U.S., there are
about half a million children in foster care. (wow !!!!!!) -- many are from a simple domestic situation the day prior and throws the child into the system for years n years --- (sad n tough to handle I agree -- and I do not have the answers but need to at least bring it up )
Most we hope will be in foster care for only a short time, returning home or to live with a family member when the crisis has been resolved. Other children (most unfortunately due to political/ local issues), however, remain in the system.
(to all the true foster parents that do it 4 the right reasons and have thur heart in the right place -- this is just a small percent I am sure --- ) plz do not jump on me --- i just need to be open about this ---
Time magazine as well as re-quoted in the NY times --- "Most foster parents try their best to provide stable, loving environments for the children in their care. However, it is becoming increasingly clear that the U.S. foster care system is becoming a
“pipeline” for human trafficking. To some it is actually sending children into the sex industry or worse but most do not realize human trafficking isn't always so ugly ! If we really dig into the way the pay / benefit system works towards the foster care industry -- especially from state to state the abuse of funds and monies can be the act of trafficking --- In many cases the foster system helps the court system and back and forth --- just think of the many many foster families who cannot wait for the next kid so the funds continue to arrive in the mailbox or even better -- increase
-- some pay or get involved in huge local and national scams to get higher on "the list" -- It is a tough area to get involved with since it is a true money making private industry mixed with a government agency combined with individuals (many many incredible and just trying to help ! )
at this event I was helping pass out food baskets --- -
-- I actually see multiple peeps explaining to others who were being
"recruited" about the extra money and the extra work/chores around the house they can have--- and the food they can get and benefits --
-- I heard one woman (another bad egg-- I'm sure most r soo wonderful -- ) but on a napkin she was explaining how with 3 kids if you do the math -- you can come ahead each month and have time instead of you and your hubby having to "work" --
-- I could go on n on with sick sick stories -- because this prompted me to look into deeper since I felt guilty that years ago I helped these same people as I thought I was helping the kids 2 ?
the facts seem to be --- much different than many know -- --- many adults who are now out of the "system" yet got fought up into sex or trade industry will quickly say foster care was the training ground to actually being trafficked (with the foster parents attached to that "check" instead of love -- just like her pimp is now "attached" to the cash she/he brings in )
- Over 70 % of rescued sex slaves who have been arrested or saved have been in foster care at some point
-"most foster mindset is that they are tied to a paycheck, the kids worth and value were not intrinsic; she/he was worth only the money she/he brought in. This is set up as easy prey for traffickers.?????"
EVERY STUDY I HAVE EVER READ --- has a statement very similar to this
"the money that is given by the state is supposed to be utilized to provide for the child’s basic needs — however the money is more often than not used for other things, specifically for special luxuries for the actual caretaker and their own biological children and families, unrelated to the financial support of the actual child it was intended for.
These caregivers will make statements like “you’re not my child, I don’t care what’s going on with you, as long as you’re not dead, I’ll continue to get my paycheck.”
This “nothing but a paycheck” theory objectifies the youth and the youth begin to normalize the perception that their presence is to be used for financial gain. This creates a mind frame for the youth that their purpose is to bring income into a household! " VERY SAD
There will always be children who require care outside of their biological families. Clearly, what we are doing now is not always working well. In fact, it seems as if foster care is often a precursor to becoming a victim of human trafficking. We must do better for our children, especially children who are most vulnerable.