How Do You Like Your Burger?

EveryDayAmnesiac

Well-Known Member

I'm talking type of meat, temp, preparation, ingredients, toppings, you name it.

I'd be willing to wager that there are plenty of people on this forum who are just as passionate about their burgers as they are about their vaporizers, and probably equally as obsessed with the grill those burgers are made on. So here's your chance to let that passion be known and shown...

Think you're King Shit and make burgers better than anyone? Then prove it, you pompous turd (:brow:) ... by sharing your secrets to me so that I can pretend the ideas were my own and can thereafter be the popular know-it-all douchebag at backyard cookouts...

I'm not much of a meat eater, but when I do "want some meat," it's gotta be a burger. I fucking love burgers. Interestingly enough, it doesn't matter so much what type of meat, as long as it's burgerized... Hell, I even love veggie burgers, as long as they're a decent approximation. Nothing sexier than a burger that's well put-together...

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Hell, I'd probably eat Soylent Green if it were a burger... :evil:

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E.D.A.'s OCD BS (Burger Special :lol:)

When possible, I like my burger done a very particular way...

Might be obvious, but I want mine done on the grill. No sauces. And the woman working the grill better look like this:


Gimme a thick one. None of that McDonald's razor-thin bullshit.

MEDIUM ALL THE WAY THROUGH! Not medium rare in one section, or medium well in another, I'm talking fucking MEDIUM ALL THE WAY THROUGH.

On top of the burger will be placed LIGHTLY sauteed red jalapenos / cremini mushrooms (using olive oil and garlic). AFTER THAT, muenster cheese (the really pricey variety) will be placed over the peppers / mush and be allowed to melt, capturing them.

On top of the cheese will be placed raw spinach, sliced raw white onion, and a VERY thin slice of raw tomato.

The toppings should stack nicely and evenly, with none of them "spilling out."

On both parts of the well-toasted whole grain bun will be placed a light amount of spicy guacamole, preferably made with cilantro and a shot of rum to go with my shot of rum. :cheers:

If I'm feeling really naughty, I'll add some diced pancetta.

The burger will be cut into equal halves.

Also, it sure as shit better be made from scratch. And it sure as shit better not come from meat that's been frozen. Minimal ingredients in the paddy itself.


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I'm looking to branch out and enjoy burgers in diff. ways... Suggestions? Tips / Tricks? Crazy vegan recipes? Weird preferences ? Feel the need to add meat toppings to an already-meat sandwich? Just hungry for a burger now? Feel free to say so.

I'm hoping @dorkus_molorkus can teach me how to make a good ostrich burger... But what is the best way to kill an ostrich? :shrug: A video would be really helpful.

PS. Halfway through writing this post, I had to go make myself a burger! :lol:
 
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EveryDayAmnesiac

Well-Known Member
I like em served with Peanuts!

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As if you weren't getting enough protein in the burger already! :lol:

Man, Five Guys burgers.... they're a heart attack sandwiched between a bun, but holy shit, they are fucking good. :mmmm:

"Diet" coke, of course. :rofl:

Man, it's always the lure of the hamburger that gets my brain itching for fast food...
 

syrupy

Authorized Buyer
There used to be this place off the highway called Murder Burger, that served all kinds of beasts between hamburger buns. Their ostrich was tasty.

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When I went back there the place was renamed Redrum Burger, which in my opinion is an even more gruesome name, especially if you like some red in your burger.

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I wanted to try the 1lb "Annihilator", but wasn't sure if the name was about how my digestive system would feel after eating this monster.

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But I ended up with a Bison burger instead.


Mmmm, mmmm, Redrum Burger.




 
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thisperson

Ruler of all things person
I really like the burgers at a local diner here called Steve Jr's Burgers. I go for their Bacon Avocado Cheese Burger. It's almost nine dollars for the combo but nothing beats a good burger.
 

crawdad

floatin
80/20 beef. hand mix in worcestershire, garlic pepper, steak seasoning, little dash of maple syrup, some bbq sauce (digging cola-q now). end result should still be firm otherwise you wet too much and now need more meat (dont use crumbs, its a burger not meatloaf). make large firm patties and push down center top some for heat expansion, cover top with light layer of more garlic pepper and bbq sauce and grill over wood fire, i cover it for no flame up. dont flip till bottom got some black on it then when flip its a quicker grill for top and off, done. lightly toast the bun add mayo and nothing else, make a side salad as a garnish. eat in silence, blindfold optional.
 

arf777

No longer dogless
About 90% 80/20 beef (preferably round but chuck works), other 10% my homemade bacon ground up in it. Then salted and peppered, seared in rendered bacon fat, then finished in a pork belly stock I make. Cheese either cave-aged gruyere, dill havarti or a good swiss, using the belly stock to stem the cheese til melted. And of course three or four thick-cut pieces of homemade bacon, kosher pickles, mayo, mustard and fresh tomatoes topping it. Have eaten three like this so far this week.
 

EveryDayAmnesiac

Well-Known Member
Could not ignore the call of the burger this afternoon.

Had a bunch of mushrooms and some really nice Swiss cheese so I decided to go for the classic mushroom Swiss burger... extra, extra, extra mushrooms! And some sauerkraut.

Bison burger.... mmm. I may prefer it to beef... :shrug:

God, I'm getting hungry for another one already...
 

DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
Could not ignore the call of the burger this afternoon.

Had a bunch of mushrooms and some really nice Swiss cheese so I decided to go for the classic mushroom Swiss burger... extra, extra, extra mushrooms! And some sauerkraut.

Bison burger.... mmm. I may prefer it to beef... :shrug:

God, I'm getting hungry for another one already...
Really? I just ate lunch... come to my favorite place to see what's up, and get treated to another helping of "hunger pains"!?

"mushroom Swiss burger... extra, extra, extra mushrooms!" YUMMMM! Goes good with A1 Steak Sauce!!!!

I think I just drooled!!! :drool:
 

grokit

well-worn member
The best burgers in the history of the universe are sadly no more...
http://www.oldlarestaurants.com/hamptons-2/

People loved the eighty varieties of burgers, including Stan’s Fantasy (with sour cream and black caviar), The Nelly Burger (creamed horseradish and bacon) and The Foggy Bottom Burger (peanut butter and sour plum jam). People also loved the little buffet that accompanied each burger, allowing you to further dress your sandwich and pile the plate with salads and side dishes. The menu did not include french fries — odd for a burger joint ...
 
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arf777

No longer dogless
Some of the amazing burgers I have ever seen..I have just stopped eating burger because of increasing weight:(
I will be doing the same shortly - gotta lose at least 20 pounds. Until then here is one made as I described above- 90% 80/20 Angus chuck, 10% madeira-armagnac bacon, seared in bacon fat, seethed in bacon stock, topped with cave-aged gruyere and more madeira-armagnac bacon, full sour kosher pickles and sliced tomato.


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EveryDayAmnesiac

Well-Known Member
I will be doing the same shortly - gotta lose at least 20 pounds. Until then here is one made as I described above- 90% 80/20 Angus chuck, 10% madeira-armagnac bacon, seared in bacon fat, seethed in bacon stock, topped with cave-aged gruyere and more madeira-armagnac bacon, full sour kosher pickles and sliced tomato.


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Now that's a burger! :mmmm:

Will definitely have to look for some "burger meat" at the Farmer's Market tomorrow....
 
EveryDayAmnesiac,
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basement farmer

My face is melting...
As someone who got a worthless B.S. in Animal Science I'm amazed by the success of the marketing success of the American Angus Association at their ability to market one breed's meat as something above and beyond normal beef, especially ground beef.

As a marijuana user, I gotta be honest with you and spread the word that meat is meat. If it tastes good that's because it's loaded with fat....animal fat. Your taste buds are genetically predisposed to favor something that is loaded with things that will get you through the winter. So it doesn't really matter if it's Angus "prime", Hereford, Holstein cull, Brahman standard, or whatever, if it has a high enough fat content, it's going to taste good.

So, don't feel bad when you go to the meat department and don't dropthe premium dime on the "Angus Prime" selects. Just look for the most fat flecked Piece under the cellophane and fluorescent and you'll be just as happy and a whole less lot ripped off.
 

arf777

No longer dogless
As someone who got a worthless B.S. in Animal Science I'm amazed by the success of the marketing success of the American Angus Association at their ability to market one breed's meat as something above and beyond normal beef, especially ground beef.

As a marijuana user, I gotta be honest with you and spread the word that meat is meat. If it tastes good that's because it's loaded with fat....animal fat. Your taste buds are genetically predisposed to favor something that is loaded with things that will get you through the winter. So it doesn't really matter if it's Angus "prime", Hereford, Holstein cull, Brahman standard, or whatever, if it has a high enough fat content, it's going to taste good.

So, don't feel bad when you go to the meat department and don't dropthe premium dime on the "Angus Prime" selects. Just look for the most fat flecked Piece under the cellophane and fluorescent and you'll be just as happy and a whole less lot ripped off.


I prefer Angus cuz I know a number of people who raise that breed, and I know how they treat the animals.

But that being said not all beef tastes the same, though I presume it has more to do with what the animals are fed and how they are exercised than by the breed. But either way, as a former chef and butcher, I can tell you I most certainly can taste the difference between North carolina Angus, Japanese Kobe, and Texas beef. All taste better than most generic US beef.
 
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