Backout buyers, how do you feel about them?

[SalamiCity]

So I've been waiting to sell my stuff to this dude for a week now, he said he wanted it 100%, and then nope... No pms, no nothing, I think he even blocked me.


Then I try to sell it to another dude who wanted it, but he ended up buying something else... LAME.


I hate when people promise to buy something, then lie about it.

WEAK.

 

[Caligula]

Welcome to the internets! Seriously though, this isnt some huge corporate merger that fell through. Just move on. It happens.

 

[SalamiCity]

Thanks for welcoming me to a place that I've been on longer than you. Besides being on the net has nothing to do with backing out of something.

You have no idea what I was selling, or what even happened, so keep your comments in your pocket!

I've moved on, it doesn't mean I cannot post my feelings on the "internet" towards people who lie about their claims, I call them as I see them.

So Caligula you must love liars then?

I'm not even mad he backed out, I'm mad he promised to buy it, tells me he's going to the bank to deposit the money, will send that night, and then ignores pm's for a week.. That's called dirty. At least be man enough to pm me back, if you couldn't buy it, that sucks, but don't lie.

 

[lwien]

Caligula, I kinda have empathy in what SC is going through. My Ascent was sold a month over a month ago here, and I'm still awaiting payment. I haven't shipped out the Ascent yet, but still, having to wait over a month for payment with numerous excuses (which could be valid) stated as to why it's taking so long is kind of a drag, especially when your low on funds and kind of in need that money. I'm not quite sure what to do here. The Ascent is packaged up and ready to go but it's been that way for a long time now. I've had a few PM's, but only after much prodding. It is a drag. Should I just sell it to someone else even though I committed it to the person who said they wanted it over a month ago? What makes matters even worse is that this transaction has happened between me and a very long standing member here, and no, I will never divulge who that person is. It's a bummer..............First time that I've ever had an issue selling anything here.

On the other hand, SC, no need to personally insult Cal over this even though he did kind of invalidate what you're going through, eh?

 

[Vicki]

Caligula, I kinda have empathy in what SC is going through. My Ascent was sold a month over a month ago here, and I'm still awaiting payment. I haven't shipped out the Ascent yet, but still, having to wait over a month for payment with numerous excuses (which could be valid) stated as to why it's taking so long is kind of a drag, especially when your low on funds and kind of in need that money. I'm not quite sure what to do here. The Ascent is packaged up and ready to go but it's been that way for a long time now. I've had a few PM's, but only after much prodding. It is a drag. Should I just sell it to someone else even though I committed it to the person who said they wanted it over a month ago? What makes matters even worse is that this transaction has happened between me and a very long standing member here, and no, I will never divulge who that person is. It's a bummer..............First time that I've ever had an issue selling anything here.

On the other hand, SC, no need to personally insult Cal over this even though he did kind of invalidate what you're going through, eh?

Maybe they should add a rule to the classifieds stating that if you agree to purchase an item from a member, you must be able to send payment to said member within, say, 2 weeks. (trying to pick a fair time frame) If the buyer does not submit payment within that time, the seller can re-sell the item to someone else, or re-list the item.

 

[lwien]

^^ Not a bad idea. I'm in a real quandary here. The person who committed that they wanted the Ascent is a very well respected, long time FC veteran here, and I very much respect this person as well..........But what in the hell do I do here? Sell it to someone else, or continue to send PM's in the hopes that this sale will eventually go through? Argghhhhh............... On three seperate occasions starting over a month ago, they PM'd me to say that they were sorry and they would get the funds in the mail ASAP. Didn't happen on each of those occasions. After a few more PM's, I finally got a response stating that they were sorry again, but that they would get the funds in the mail right away. I requested a PM back along with a tracking number as soon as the funds were put in the mail. This was 4 days ago. I haven't heard a thing.

I just wish this person would do one of two things. Either tell me that they no longer want it so I can sell it to someone else without feeling that I am hanging them to dry, or.......................SHOW ME THE FUCKING MONEY !!!!

 

[deadheadbill]

Thanks for welcoming me to a place that I've been on longer than you. Besides being on the net has nothing to do with backing out of something.

You have no idea what I was selling, or what even happened, so keep your comments in your pocket!

I've moved on, it doesn't mean I cannot post my feelings on the "internet" towards people who lie about their claims, I call them as I see them.

So Caligula you must love liars, I guess you are one also?

I'm not even mad he backed out, I'm mad he promised to buy it, tells me he's going to the bank to deposit the money, will send that night, and then ignores pm's for a week.. That's called dirty. At least be man enough to pm me back, if you couldn't buy it, that sucks, but don't lie.

The only thing I hate worse than backout buyers is people who insult others for no reason.

 

[lwien]

Personally, I really don't mind backout buyers. Hell, shit happens that could cause this. But if you're gonna back out, than just fucking tell me you're backing out.

I'm one or two days away of taking Cal's advice and just movin' on with this transaction.

 

[SalamiCity]

No insult was meant to him, I found his response extremely rude and insulting personally. Yeah we all have issues, but you shouldn't belittle someone who is in the middle of an issue, what does that solve, and I am definitely allowed to state my feelings.

I agree with you both, I think there should be something done like on boromarket. If you dibs, it's yours. Sadly with the way the rules are set, and how it's all pm how does this work?


As you mentioned above Iwien this is my problem as well. I had one dude who wanted it, I didn't get a pm back for awhile, then dude #2 comes around, promises he will buy it, says he's going to the bank, and nothing.

I pm him back nicely just wanting to know what's up, blah blah blah blah. Dude #1 comes back to me and wants it again, but I told him Dude #2 is about to pay.

I wait a week and then pm dude #1 back and he says he bought something else, but still wants it... So you can see how upsetting it is that I almost lost the sale to dude #1 as well.

Dude #2 not only couldn't pm me back with a "sorry don't want it" but you ignore me on here as well? The only reason I saw the ignore(which I'm assuming is an ignore) was since I cannot see when he logs in anymore to watch him view other sales.


It's just plain rude, and yeah maybe it wasn't a huge business merger, which who cares if it was, and who cares if I was selling a 25cent lemonaid, the problem is I was expecting 350$ for black friday deals and goodies, and I lost out on all sorts of awesome online deals, which isn't a huge problem, but I still wanted the money, and still do.

i also don't like having stuff laying around, toys are meant to be used.

The only thing I hate worse than backout buyers is people who insult others for no reason.

I felt the same way, no need to insult me for no reason, I just wanna post my claims.

Personally, I really don't mind backout buyers. Hell, shit happens that could cause this. But if you're gonna back out, than just fucking tell me you're backing out.

that's what I'm saying. At least let me know what's up!




also just to clarify, I wasn't trying to insult him, I felt it was the opposite, no need to have everyone gang up on me, if someone doesn't like what someone else's thread, don't post, pretty simple eh? I also find it funny no one made a comment to him. I guess we play favorites here.

 

[2 Paces]

also just to clarify, I wasn't trying to insult him, I felt it was the opposite, no need to have everyone gang up on me, if someone doesn't like what someone else's thread, don't post, pretty simple eh? I also find it funny no one made a comment to him. I guess we play favorites here.

In fairness, you did start a thread specifically asking how others felt about backout buyers in the title. Caligula posted in the thread letting you know how he felt about them.

I read Caligula's response as 'shit happens, I don't let backout buyers bother me'. He was just answering the question you posed (with a humorous remark). I didn't see it as an attack or insult toward you.

You may not agree with his opinion, but you did ask for it

 

[SalamiCity]

Personally, I really don't mind backout buyers. Hell, shit happens that could cause this. But if you're gonna back out, than just fucking tell me you're backing out.

In fairness, you did start a thread specifically asking how others felt about backout buyers in the title. Caligula posted in the thread letting you know how he felt about them.

I read Caligula's response as 'shit happens, I don't let backout buyers bother me'. He was just answering the question you posed (with a humorous remark). I didn't see it as an attack or insult toward you.

You may not agree with his opinion, but you did ask for it

Yeah, but there is always a way to phrase things. "Welcome to the internet, lol jay kay." That isn't needed. As well as the whole "business merger"

He could have said politely "I don't see a problem with backing out, it isn't that big of a deal."

I could have been nicer in my post as well, but I was, as you can see, annoyed.

I didn't ask for rudeness, I asked for how people felt. He felt it was no big deal, and Iwien felt the same as I did.

I didn't explain everything in my first post, but I did explain in a follow up. It's annoying for someone to dibs, then backout, on Boromarket you get banned for that, and on facebook groups you get blacklisted.

 

[Quetzalcoatl]

I think it was more of an apathetic response

Maybe they should add a rule to the classifieds stating that if you agree to purchase an item from a member, you must be able to send payment to said member within, say, 2 weeks. (trying to pick a fair time frame) If the buyer does not submit payment within that time, the seller can re-sell the item to someone else, or re-list the item.

Paging @vtac

 

[deadheadbill]

@SalamiCity You editted both of your posts multiple times to tone them down. I would never have bothered if you had not insulted @Caligula at least twice in your initial response to him. If you are going to post something don't change it when you get called out.

I don't have a horse in this race and wish you the best in recovering your monies. I just have a knee jerk reaction when I see people being unnecessarily rude to others. I saw Caligua's post as a humorous way of saying "it's not that big of a deal in the whole scheme of life to me and I would just let it blow over. Yet your reply insulted him, called him a liar etc. because he did not have the same opinion as you.

Either way, my response was simply to point this out to you in a semi-humorous comment, not meant to start a war.

 

[t-dub]

In my experience cash is king. Flakes and mooches can step aside. You want to buy something from me? You want to negotiate and agree to a sale? If there is a meeting of the minds I expect payment promptly unless something special has been specified in advance. This was especially important on items in inventory that were $50,000+ and had more than one buyer. For repeat customers a well thought out order or hold might be arranged but everything was on paper with a cash deposit to firm up the understanding.

 

[Caligula]

I have been well aware of the progress of this thread, and am saddened by the eventual need for me to formulate a response. OP missed the point/context/tone of my reply, and there isn't anything else to it.

To bring things full circle, I should point out that my initial post applies in this situation as well. Its the internet, and stuff like this happens. Just move on.

 

[lwien]

To bring things full circle, I should point out that my initial post applies in this situation as well. Its the internet, and stuff like this happens. Just move on.

Cal, some of us need to vent a bit before doing that.

 

[Hexi]

It is what it is. No one likes it when someone "backs out of a deal". But as we've learned, even contracts can be torn up and discarded if you can afford fancy enough lawyers.

 

[lwien]

Finally got the real answer. Buyer fell on some bad financial times. Just wish he would have told me that from the get go, so.............the Ascent is back up for sale. Here's hoping this doesn't happen again. Never did before.

But to be clear, I've sold a few things here on this site and the deals went through without a hitch. I don't want anyone reading this to think that it's a systemic problem here 'cause that could not be further from the truth.

 

[Vicki]

Like we have always told our daughter, if you don't keep it, your word is worth nothing.

 

[lwien]

Like we have always told our daughter, if you don't keep it, your word is worth nothing.

Yeah, but shit happens, even to well intentions. The key though is to be truthful and let the other party know ASAP what the real scoop is. If ya can't follow through on a commitment, admit it asap rather than trying to dance around the issue. That just makes a bad situation worse.

Ok............I'm done.

 

[JCat]

I agree ... backing out isn't always "going back on your word" ... sometimes there are unforeseen circumstances ... communication is key though as otherwise you are a dick for not buying the item!

If you can't come through on an agreement "man-up" (or "person-up" to be non-sexist? ) and let the other person know.

 

[Vicki]

Yeah, but shit happens, even to well intentions. The key though is to be truthful and let the other party know ASAP what the real scoop is. If ya can't follow through on a commitment, admit it asap rather than trying to dance around the issue. That just makes a bad situation worse.

Ok............I'm done.

That is what I meant by my comment.

 

[pakalolo]

Allow me to quote myself from another thread:

Here is pakalolo's first rule of posting in online forums:

Never post when you are pissed off.​

Write the response, by all means, in fact I encourage that—but do not post it! Instead, revise it to say exactly the same thing but in a nice calm manner. If you can't, you should be thankful you didn't post it and delete it. If you can, then you should decide if you still want to post it. Lots of times you'll say to hell with it and delete it anyway.

I wrote that because this is the second time today I've had to step in where normally good members start sniping at one another. When you think you've been insulted, make a report and let the moderators handle it. Responding means you put yourself in danger of breaking the rules and increases the chance of a flame war. This advice applies to anyone else who thinks offense has been given. Attempts to moderate someone can easily do more harm than good. Any time you find yourself writing about another member's posting style you are are on thin ice.

We will not be implementing a rule to penalize people who do not complete a sale. The conditions for a deal are completely in the hands of the seller. You can specify a deadline for completing the sale when the offer is made. If you don't, you can still give a deadline any time the potential buyer seems reluctant.

 

[vtac]

Yep, acceptable payment time is up to the seller. I think that for the most part buyers and sellers here do their best to be accommodating and reasonable.

Despite this thread's title, let's keep this discussion on a positive track and try not to turn it into a negative feedback thread. We already have one of those in the Classifieds section.

 

[Quetzalcoatl]

My little brother was trying to sell a game on Amazon (GTA5) for like $10 or so off retail price, thing is his disc was perfect but still opened and used. First buyer fell through after a week or so I think. He was bummed. Three days after relisting he had my mom drop it off on the way to work at a shipping center.

I dunno. I've tried selling stuff before (not on FC) and had one person fall through as well. Gave him a decent amount of time. Didn't happen. Being peeved is natural, but IMO just time wasted when you could have been happy or focusing on other things. The less time you realize you have the more valuable it becomes to you. I guess what I'm trying to say is yeah it would annoy me, too, but whatever. I would have been a bit more annoyed had it been money that I had "already spent" but then again there's eggs and baskets.

Thanks for clarification @stickstones and @vtac makes sense that it should be discussed privately as to make way for special circumstances.

For what it's worth I was in the "buyer with money soon" position here once. I was buying the ThermoVape Evolution from another member but wouldn't have the money until it was deposited in my account, in a few days. He "took the chance" and I came through. Ended up selling it some time later to someone that paid right away but I told him in PM that I wouldn't be able to ship it for a few days while I got back into town. Didn't feel comfortable giving him my PP until I was back and with item in hand so I kinda set up that safeguard. He took the "risk" of maybe not hearing back from me (what if someone offered me more?) and it worked out well.

I know it gets stressing sometimes, especially when money is money and could help make the next few weeks/month comfortable. I guess at the same time no one really wants to be "that guy" that really wanted to buy it and then couldn't go through. Sometimes you're in a tough situation and it's not a very comfortable feeling. Life happens. I just kinda roll with it.

I should probably go to bed. Been about two days and some hours now. This (post) is way too long, isn't it?