Asperger's Syndrome & MMJ

Enchantre

Oil Painter
As aspies, we seek and we find... We ask, and we receive....
aspiecard-png.18691

The Little King of Stim Toys!!!!

I don't sell em.... but I do have one....

http://www.ebay.com/itm/1PCs-Stress-Relief-6-side-Fidget-Cube-Dice-Gift-For-Family-Adults-Kids-Black-Red/252636610218?_trksid=p2045573.c100506.m3226&_trkparms=aid=555014&algo=PL.DEFAULT&ao=1&asc=38530&meid=390fb3ee1f2546b494cf3759d1549337&pid=100506&rk=1&rkt=1&

the-fidget-cube-640x533.jpg
I've ordered a pair of these, also. Hubby is a change jingler; it drives me nuts.
I'm a fiddler, nail picker, and hair twirler/face rubber. This could be good.
 
Enchantre,
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herbivore21

Well-Known Member
OldNewbie, I think that autism speaks is actually a support org for the families, specifically parents, of the extremely autistic. Most of the aspies I know take exception to their stance on finding a genetic "cure" and preventing the birth of any and all future autistics.
WTF!!!! Does an organization actually speak in those terms about their own family members on the autism spectrum? That is some eugenic bullshit!
 

Krazy

Well-Known Member
They do and it is, lol. But entirely understandable within the small, original, context. The problem from my and aspie activists POV? Applying the original model to a much larger and more diverse demographic and claiming to "speak" for them.
 

muunch

hotboxing the cockpit
So, after reading this thread and identifying a lot with what people have said of their own experiences (HWS and DDave from the last page especially) I took that test and was neurotypical.

Shit's fucked. I haven't gone to therapy after my little brother died, and I dropped out of therapy a few years prior to that when they tried to force me on SSRIs.

And now, I know I need to go and start working through a lot of this bullshit but I can barely find motivation to leave my apartment and do basic, simple things I need to.

Obviously this has a lot to do with depression rather than asperger's, but much of my reasoning for not wanting to go out is that I don't want to see/deal with other people... I identify with https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hikikomori that concept a lot, but obviously am not the embodiment of it.

Just offtopic ranting/venting here.
 

DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
but much of my reasoning for not wanting to go out is that I don't want to see/deal with other people...
Hey @muunch , I am sorry to hear of your brother!

The "not going out" behavior may have become a habit of convenience, rather than a coping mechanism, by now. Maybe a start to breaking the habit would be going out, but to a destination where very few or no people are around. Do this till you feel comfortable going out. Once you reach that point, you can try moving the "going out" destination to one closer to people. Maybe chance passing by one or a few others. Then make this a habit.... and continue on till you merge back into what you consider normal social contacts.

Regardless of being Aspie or not, anyone can get overloaded and it sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Keep any changes you make to a smaller scale to avoid any type of overload requiring you to revert back to not going out.
 

muunch

hotboxing the cockpit
I was hoping over winter break, I would be able to work through some of these things. I have been talking about going to therapy since the incident happened a year and a half ago and just don't care enough (I guess) to get the ball rolling.


Being a college student and working, I of course do see/deal with people but I typically find these interactions tense and awkward and always reflect back on my own parts in the conversations negatively, finding I don't have the courage or etc to say how I really feel and will often just let people say/do as they please even if I disagree with it.


I think I've been a "loner" etc since I was little. My childhood was not easy...
I was diagnosed with ADD or ADHD (whatever) when I was little and they tried to put me on amphetamines but my mom did not allow it (thank you mom<3) but idk.

My late teen years (and I guess to this day, still) were not much better. Lots of conflict with my stepfather and etc. Got kicked out of the house early. Went to jail. Went to rehab. Am way behind "schedule" compared to those I graduated highschool with... It just makes me feel like I'm not at all in the right spot. I wasn't even a "bad" person. I don't steal from or hurt other people intentionally - my family (and the US gvt) don't seem to understand or condone my self-medication regimens... Which I understand laws and wanting me to be "safe" etc but idk...



For those who do test positive for Asperger's on that test, I would be interested to see how you score on the MBTI.

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

As a psychology major, I should not advocate this test or really think that it holds any weight, but in my subjective experience it seems pretty accurate. I got the same score over multiple years (obviously not exact, but my typing was the same) and through varying mindstates (I took the test when I was addicted to, and on a heavy dose of IV methoxetamine) and got the same score.


I get the feeling that this may be why I thought it was possible I had Asperger's, as my typing is one of the more rare (2nd lowest % chance I believe) and really seem to suffer with social things, but I'm great at reading people and etc... There is just some other disconnect that comes. Possibly from a lack of self-confidence. I get really nervous even making posts here and often edit my posts multiple times as to not offend anyone or convey the wrong message... I don't know.
 
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Krazy

Well-Known Member
Muunch:

Hikikomori: sadly I did not need to open the link to know what you were talking about.:p

Excellent advice from DDave on how to at least make the effort. That is also what they tell the newer PTSD guys at the VA. Something as simple as wandering Walmart off hours every week rather than having someone else shop for you.

The problem of course is that very few people have long term issues that are NOT comorbid. You are a working student so you have mastered social isolation in the midst of a crowd. You can till work it but with a few tweeks. Making the effort to engage the cashier when shopping? Saying good morning with a smile to coworkers/students? Go to a topic specific
https://www.meetup.com that interests you?

Docs love to create symptom clusters and treat people based on specific, stand alone, disorders. This really only flies if you are untainted by life and recently acquire a specific and stand alone problem. Combine starting out with any kind of outlying psychological trait and long term psychological trauma of any kind? The cooky cutter model no longer works for you.

Other stuff, blah blah blah....

Oh, look up Complex PTSD if you get a chance. It very much applies to old skool Nam Vets that got worse rather than better, survivors of childhood trauma, etc..
 

DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
and just don't care enough (I guess) to get the ball rolling.
I don't think it's down to whether or not you care. You do care, at least enough to air your thoughts/feelings in this thread.
We're creatures of habit. And it's just easier to maintain the habit, than any effort to make a change.

always reflect back on my own parts in the conversations negatively,
I used to do this. So much so that I never really got into a conversation, as I was so busy pre-thinking out every sentence, every response.
Took a bit of time, but picked up on some non-verbal queues so I could interject into the conversations at the right moments....
also took some not caring about getting negative responses. they happen in normal conversations.. .i just needed to get that through my head!
finding I don't have the courage or etc to say how I really feel
Find this!
First is finding the value in what you have to say.
Once you've assigned value to your message, it will be easier to delivery it.

I think I've been a "loner" etc since I was little. My childhood was not easy...
I was diagnosed with ADD or ADHD (whatever) when I was little and they tried to put me on amphetamines
Me too.

Mom was ok with it... I said No.

Besides, my psych was a jerk....

Am way behind "schedule" compared to those I graduated highschool with... It just makes me feel like I'm not at all in the right spot.
Whose schedule? I set my own. You should too....

Heck, it too me 1/2 a century to figure out that others didn't perceive things as I did. I'm logical, to the point of schooling Vulcans on the side (when not modding).... I find almost all others are more emotional do varying degrees.... that determines heavily on how we perceive things.... that in combination with other factors.
I wasn't even a "bad" person. I don't steal from or hurt other people intentionally
I was.... (throw tomatoes now please).

Not any longer. It was the Aspie diagnosis, albeit self diagnosis, that made it possible for me to change.

For those who do test positive for Asperger's on that test, I would be interested to see how you score on the MBTI.

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
I'll be taking this.... will circle back with results...

Excellent advice from DDave on how to at least make the effort.
Thanks! Only because I speak from experience.... :nod:
 

DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
Mods, sorry for back to back.... but "results"....

From http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

INTJ
Introvert(41%) iNtuitive(6%) Thinking(38%) Judging(25%)
  • You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (41%)
  • You have slight preference of Intuition over Sensing (6%)
  • You have moderate preference of Thinking over Feeling (38%)
  • You have moderate preference of Judging over Perceiving (25%)
 

muunch

hotboxing the cockpit
HEEEEY we match :)


my last results were:

I (34%)
N (62%)
T (9%)
J (25%)


e:

also I thank you for the response up there. A lot of my issues stem from lack of self-confidence (thx fatherfigures) and I think only time/successes will change that.

I wish it was as simple as flipping a switch. I'm much more socially engaged and it's easier to be "in the moment" than stuck rummaging through all sorts of garbage after I get medicated but it doesn't fully solve things.

Not that I'm expecting a cureall but.

Anyway, I'll stop bringing this offtopic now.
 
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muunch,
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DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
HEEEEY we match :)
:cheers:

I get medicated but it doesn't fully solve things.
Here's where I gotta split hairs.
Getting medicated does help. Getting wasted, that's what doesn't.
(not saying you do either, just pointing it out)

I'm very comfortable taking a microdose, then getting into a conversation with anyone.

But, if I get wasted, full blown introvert.

For me, this has a lot to do with the company I keep or things I must do. When I was younger, getting with a group and getting wasted, was easy to talk to everyone. Hell, we almost fought over who got to speak at any one moment. That's a bit exaggerated, but you get the point.

Then again, we planned on getting wasted, so no surprises on what followed...
 

muunch

hotboxing the cockpit
I've been taking a t-break for the past few days, should be around a week when I start up again so hopefully I can start on microdosing. It's highly possible my overconsumption was negatively affecting things, but I need to see. I'm also not the best at objectively observing myself sometimes so really I have no idea.

I often get introverted when wasted because of self-doubt (very typical of myself) but cdp-choline does help somewhat with that... I would prefer not to have to band-aid remedy that situation as I can definitely see how microdosing would likely be much more beneficial for me... but the "eh, fuck it..." attitude has been very persistent in me the past few months

edit: I was also completely drug-free when my brother died and for the next 10 months after, and then I was back to combusting semi-regularly til late October when I found this place.... So I'm not entirely sure I'd blame my mindstate on overconsumption, but it could have been contributing.
 
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DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
I know overconsumption zaps me when I'm not planning to be in that state of mind. Needs to be the right time, people, place, etc...

The thing that rules about micro-dosing is that if it's not enough, (after waiting 15 minutes or so), then dose again.
Eventually, you'll dial in your sweet spot. Just remember to target the level of effects you seek, then dial into them.
 

HellsWindStaff

Dharma Initiate
I am 3/4 with you guys:

INTP

Slight Preference to Introversion to Extroversion (12%)
Slight Preference of Intuition over Sensing (16%)
Moderate Preference Thinking over Feeling (31%)
Slight Preference of Perceiving over Judging (19%)

>INTPs are pensive, analytical folks. They may venture so deeply into thought as to seem detached, and often actually are oblivious to the world around them.

This is kind of me, seeming detached and in my own thought, I don't know if I'm "actually oblivious to world around" lol but that may be my obliviousness talking.

>Precise about their descriptions, INTPs will often correct others (or be sorely tempted to) if the shade of meaning is a bit off. While annoying to the less concise, this fine discrimination ability gives INTPs so inclined a natural advantage as, for example, grammarians and linguists.

I am super concise in my word choice, both online and real life.

>INTPs are relatively easy-going and amenable to almost anything until their principles are violated, about which they may become outspoken and inflexible. They prefer to return, however, to a reserved albeit benign ambiance, not wishing to make spectacles of themselves.

haahahahahaha this is me so much. I am basically the easiest going guy ever, if you fuck me IRL you are basically dead to me and I can/will hold a grudge/be petty for a long while. I am very outspoken and inflexible regarding my belief systems, though only outspoken if I am told it is wrong or their belief system is a polar opposite. I'm fine with others doing whatever, just don't tell me that I should be or feel the same way.


>A major concern for INTPs is the haunting sense of impending failure. They spend considerable time second-guessing themselves. The open-endedness (from Perceiving) conjoined with the need for competence (NT) is expressed in a sense that one's conclusion may well be met by an equally plausible alternative solution, and that, after all, one may very well have overlooked some critical bit of data. An INTP arguing a point may very well be trying to convince himself as much as his opposition. In this way INTPs are markedly different from INTJs, who are much more confident in their competence and willing to act on their convictions.

Also me, I was crippled with "fear of failure" for the majority of my life, finally starting to get out of it, tough stuff though. JUST DO IT!

>Mathematics is a system where many INTPs love to play, similarly languages, computer systems--potentially any complex system. INTPs thrive on systems. Understanding, exploring, mastering, and manipulating systems can overtake the INTP's conscious thought. This fascination for logical wholes and their inner workings is often expressed in a detachment from the environment, a concentration where time is forgotten and extraneous stimuli are held at bay. Accomplishing a task or goal with this knowledge is secondary.

Depending on your definition of "system" this is also me. When I find something I find interesting, I delve into it and learn literally as much as I can.

>INTPs and Logic -- One of the tipoffs that a person is an INTP is his or her obsession with logical correctness. Errors are not often due to poor logic -- apparent faux pas in reasoning are usually a result of overlooking details or of incorrect context.

I am super logical and constantly try to look at the root cause of things.

>Games NTs seem to especially enjoy include Risk, Bridge, Stratego, Chess, Go, and word games of all sorts. (I have an ENTP friend that loves Boggle and its variations. We've been known to sit in public places and pick a word off a menu or mayonnaise jar to see who can make the most words from its letters on a napkin in two minutes.) The INTP mailing list has enjoyed a round of Metaphore, virtual volleyball, and a few 'finish the series' brain teasers.

I like game where thinking is involved and you have to outwit your opponent, so this is also pretty on the money.


Interesting stuff, thanks for bringing it up!


Now, I came here with a question. How would you concisely and easily explain Asperger's to a Neurotypical? Specifically in the realm of how it's a challenge we've all overcame to some degree (we work on it always!) I am looking for advice as I may need to be able to "market myself" in a sense as having conquered Aspergers and am looking for an easy way to describe to Neurotypicals how an Asperger's life is different than the majority of NT populations lives without it coming across as fake or tooting my own horn too much. Does that make sense?

I kind of have the how we're different part down (NT's are Mac computers, easy to sort and file everything, clean and concise, while Asperger's are Linux, we have to delve through hoops and hurdles and explore every nook and cranny, it's a messy process but we'll have greater understanding of the details) but having a bitch trying to tout living with Aspergers successfully as a success or accomplishment :lol:
 

DDave

Vape Wizard
Accessory Maker
Risk and Stratego! :rockon:

living with Aspergers successfully
In today's world, you get bragging rights just by "Living successfully"... Living successfully with Aspergers takes that success/accomplishment to the next level! :rockon:

How would you concisely and easily explain Asperger's to a Neurotypical?
That's easy. You just need a point of reference.

Data_Poster_by_Rahal_Stmin.jpg
 

HellsWindStaff

Dharma Initiate
Risk and Stratego! :rockon:


In today's world, you get bragging rights just by "Living successfully"... Living successfully with Aspergers takes that success/accomplishment to the next level! :rockon:


That's easy. You just need a point of reference.

Data_Poster_by_Rahal_Stmin.jpg

Gracias, data is a good one!

And actually good point regarding success. I am successful, relatively, so if I tout those successes with the added caveat of also having Aspergers, that should play well. I'm trying to not have it define me but I needed to incorporate it since, it's part of me. Thanks again!

I found a really cool pen that made me think of you guys, on mobile I'll try to link it later. It was on Kickstarter, a fidget pen that you can do Sooooo much with. I want one bad lol. Save my pen caps and back ends :lol:

Found it:
 

MyCollie

Well-Known Member
Good luck getting anyone with a generic, middle of the road, psychology to truly Grok your reality if you are an outlier.

I'm definitely with you there. It's hard for people to get it.

What I'm dealing with is close enough to aspergers to cause some confusion between the two. I work my way through it and have had some success. I'm proud of what I've achieved given my circumstances but I'd take a pill to change things up in a second.
 
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Krazy

Well-Known Member
I got 100% as well, lol. But is it really an OCD test?

Fist one was mildly tricky for me as I thought about it. After that I just let my pattern recognition operate on autopilot. Once I knew which of the 3 didn't belong I could then walk it back out and define the difference.

"You have a killer eye for spotting the tinniest, most invisible inaccuracies, errors and mistakes. And it's very important to you to correct them :)"

I find it amusing that the text for "100% OCD" contains an error. A text emoticon is not a terminal punctuation point. ;)
 
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