1. What does SSTB mean? See our glossary of acronyms.

How often do you wash your............

Discussion in 'The Vapor Lounge' started by lwien, May 29, 2014.

  1. lwien

    lwien Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,737
    Location:
    Arcadia, California
    So after reading that the CEO of Levi Strauss recommends that jeans should never be washed: http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyle/2014/05/why-levis-ceo-says-to-stop-washing-your-jeans/

    .......it got me thinking about the question in the title of this thread. Not jeans in particular but just about anything, so the question is: How often do you wash your...................???

    Be truthful, regardless what you think others may think because these are questions that normally you would never divulge or ask anyone else except...................here.

    Ok, I'll start.

    How often do you wash your balls? Being that I have to cath myself every 3 to 4 hours, my balls get washed about 6 times a day. I have no doubt that I have the cleanest balls in all of FC but now I'm worried about my balls drying out from too much washing. I don't want dry balls. I want them to be smooth and supple but alas, smooth and supple balls are not in my future. :ninja:

    Next up:
    Sheets
    Towels
    Work out shorts
    T-Shirts
    Hair
    Underwear
    Car
    Dog
    Cat
    Rugs
    Bud Containers
    Bongs
    Socks
    etc etc etcd

    And how 'bout wash cloths. I mean, every time you lather up, you're washing your wash cloth so does it really need to be washed? Fuck, George Carlin should be here to weigh in on this.
     
    Last edited: May 29, 2014
  2. smokum

    smokum I am who I am and your approval isn't needed!

    Messages:
    1,668
    Location:
    Canaduhh
    Udder Butter can be your friend :nod::lol:
     
    SSVUN~YAH, lwien, Deja Vu and 2 others like this.
  3. lwien

    lwien Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,737
    Location:
    Arcadia, California
    I don't think buttering up my balls every 3 to 4 hours is in the cards either. Having a slimy ball sack sliding between my thighs when I'm walking around is not my idea of a good time. :cool:
     
  4. dorkus_molorkus

    dorkus_molorkus Majesticus Assholius

    Messages:
    1,168
    Location:
    In Uranus
    fuck theres just no helping people is there?

    I think working out a viable solution for your balls is much more important than me telling how often I wash my 'special' sock.

    For example,

    hows abouts a ball spa type arrangement?
    dropping yr nuts in some warm frothing water sure sounds nice.
    Maybe like some sort of wearable codpiece ball spa?
    we can get centi to rig up a battery pack & everything.

    like this?

    [​IMG]

    or there is this bar in Thailand that has something similar to the wearable codpiece ball spa.
    you just have to buy her drinks & pay for some rental.

    I think you may have been hasty on dissing the butter tho.
    I mean have you thought it thru?
    for instance do you own a dog?
    Theres almost a spa like experience there.

    Nice puppy.:tup:
     
  5. Deja Vu

    Deja Vu drawn to FC like animal magnetism

    Messages:
    2,089
    Location:
    bed
    I cried laughing.

    On a side note; I wash my jeans every 2 or 3 days. Whenever they get food on them which is pretty often. I have 3 pairs of jeans on rotation as well. Maybe I could be more efficient with them.. but the fuckers end up smelling bad.


    I also clean my keyboard (Ducky Shine 3) every 2 weeks. Remove ever key, soak in warm water, vacuum it, etc) and I clean my iMac screen once a month. Takes about an hour to get it spotless..
     
    RUDE BOY, SSVUN~YAH and lwien like this.
  6. HugieLewis

    HugieLewis I'm not an expert but I have a strong opinion

    Messages:
    195
    Location:
    flyover country
    So not to start a big thing here but I subscribe to the whole not washing your jeans thing. I wear raw denim and wash them at most every 8 months or so. When I get something on them I usually spot clean as needed and my lifestyle doesn't lead to a lot of dirty work in denim. Last time I had to wash a pair was when I dug someone out of some mud at work. I think normal denim is fine to wash frequently but raw is a different animal.

    Anyway, to contrast I wash my WRX (car) weekly, but my older impreza only gets a bath when it rains.
     
    SSVUN~YAH and SD_haze like this.
  7. HomeFree

    HomeFree Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    57
    Have you seen the episode of Seinfeld where Kramer got hung up on doing everything in the shower so he set up a garbage disposal in the drain?

    LOL @ washing your special sock. That's why I use disposable socks.
     
  8. Deja Vu

    Deja Vu drawn to FC like animal magnetism

    Messages:
    2,089
    Location:
    bed
     
  9. Vicki

    Vicki The Bionic Woman

    Messages:
    5,865
    I wash everything, all the time, with alcohol and sandpaper because....there might be germs and I have OCD. :lol:

    Actually, if you ask my family, this isn't far from the truth. :rofl:
     
    RUDE BOY and SSVUN~YAH like this.
  10. Deja Vu

    Deja Vu drawn to FC like animal magnetism

    Messages:
    2,089
    Location:
    bed
    More like OCD has you! I am a victim to this also. My friend (singular) looks at my strange when I ask him to wash his hands before touching my computer mouse, but if he knew the effort I went through to keep it clean.. sheesh, i won't get into it lol

    Then again, the kitchen sink and floor doesn't have the trademark cleanliness of an OCD'ist.
    I'm very inconstant. My vape is clean though ^_^
     
    Vicki likes this.
  11. FlyingLow

    FlyingLow Team NO SLEEP!

    Messages:
    1,369
    I don't ever wash my balls, I like them old and cheesy and funky. In the event I must clean, I typically dip my sack in a cup of milk then let the neighborhood cats go to town.

    I am with Vicki... nothing like a sandpaper-clean, cat-licked nut sack for me;)
     
    RUDE BOY, lwien, SSVUN~YAH and 4 others like this.
  12. Vicki

    Vicki The Bionic Woman

    Messages:
    5,865

    :rofl:
     
    SSVUN~YAH likes this.
  13. Deja Vu

    Deja Vu drawn to FC like animal magnetism

    Messages:
    2,089
    Location:
    bed
    NSFW... Me and my little brother get a bit retarded (for lack of a better word) when we hang out. We entertained the concept of the nutsack being removed from the picture. Imagine a life with just the two balls hanging on their.. strings.. No sack.
    Let that simmer in your mind's eye for a bit.
     
  14. lwien

    lwien Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,737
    Location:
    Arcadia, California
    Thank God you're not God.
     
    RUDE BOY and Deja Vu like this.
  15. basement farmer

    basement farmer My face is melting...

    Messages:
    456
    Ablutions occur on an "as needed" basis.

    It's a highly ritualized and spiritual event...
     
  16. Ox45

    Ox45 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    139
    Funny that the CEO is admitting that their jeans are of a weaker quality. Hopefully he's not kicking himself in the arse when they see a quarterly decline in sales haaha. TMI but if I have to wear my jeans for more than 6 hours, I always make sure I throw in some baby powder.

    However that does not stop me from buying every color of the 508's. 511's a lil too tight, 501's are decent but have to find some of good colors or else it reminds me something my dad would wear. Also bootcuts or any relaxed/loose fit jeans with flares towards the bottom always make a man look like he's completely out of touch when it comes to style.

    508's all day!!!!! No need to pay over 300 for designer jeans when you have 508's! I love the lose fit on the thighs and tapered bottom. I wash mines all the time.
    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: May 30, 2014
    RUDE BOY, HugieLewis and Enchantre like this.
  17. HugieLewis

    HugieLewis I'm not an expert but I have a strong opinion

    Messages:
    195
    Location:
    flyover country
    I don't think levi's denim is any better than lee's. Just sayin'. I have dropped some coin on jeans (or jawns for ya'll hypebeasts) and honestly my fav pair has been a pair of raw, selvedge gap jeans. Got them pretty cheap too. Clothing is kind of one of my hobbies....
     
  18. FlyingLow

    FlyingLow Team NO SLEEP!

    Messages:
    1,369
    LOL "...filmed for educational purposes only."
     
  19. RUDE BOY

    RUDE BOY Space is the Place

    Messages:
    2,965
    people that don't wash their levis don't live or move around outside in Florida during the day or they just don't care that they stink to high heaven.
    I have a few old biker pals that wear "stiffs" and you can smell those dumb fucks for days after they have left the building. Not washing clothes ! stupid ! why bother to take a bath if you wear stinky clothes. Pretty fucking disgusting if you ask me.

    Now Cleaning things that really matter; Vaporizers and glass. I do this daily after sessions as I can't stand dirty glass water tools, it Bothers beyond belief and appears to be the only hint of OCD behavior I display. I don't even like 'em to get a little hazy so I'll rinse it out a few times during an evenings use, consequently I don't use water tools that often. Bowls, Glass bowls and stems are all created a little different some like the solo stems I want to be clean every day but I can let the EV 2 bowls go for weeks.

    Portable vaporizers get cleaned before they are packed away at night. Always Clean and always charged.


    I'm happily Vaked at the moment so I'm rambling away in lwiens "Do you wash your Balls ? thread" Don't judge me to harshly.

    Ball washing in the morning shower, Ball washing in the evening shower seems pretty standard stuff.

    Now asking the Gals and Gays. How often should your Man wash his junk ? whats wanted ? what turns you on ? Off ? Do you care ?

    :peace:

    Peace and soap suds to y'all !
     
    Last edited: May 30, 2014
  20. FlyingLow

    FlyingLow Team NO SLEEP!

    Messages:
    1,369
    Brilliant fucking thread!
     
    lwien, EveryDayAmnesiac and RUDE BOY like this.
  21. Vicki

    Vicki The Bionic Woman

    Messages:
    5,865
    I had no idea they made something to tackle this job, but it looks awfully painful if you ask me. :lol:

    [​IMG]
     
    Buildozer, Enchantre, lwien and 4 others like this.
  22. EveryDayAmnesiac

    EveryDayAmnesiac Bad news from the stars.

    Messages:
    2,024
    This thread seems destined to be a...

     
    RUDE BOY likes this.
  23. lwien

    lwien Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,737
    Location:
    Arcadia, California
    ......shampoo your hair.

    Me...........every other day.
     
  24. dorkus_molorkus

    dorkus_molorkus Majesticus Assholius

    Messages:
    1,168
    Location:
    In Uranus
    Im glad you lot find this a very amusing thread and all,

    but what about poor @lwien 's chaffed fucking balls?

    Am I the only one thats thinking about his balls?
    Like all the fucking time?

    Oh the humanity.

    Should he butter them? should oil them?
    should he use 'I cant believe its not butter' on them and get Fabio around to make motorboat on his balls?
    Should he apply chocolate frosting on them and hang out at scientology meetings hoping to run into Kirstie Alley?

    Would this type of arrangement below help with your buttery balls?

    [​IMG]
    If so, just ask paka where he gets them?
    Nice knee pads as well paka, are they the new Nike "Gloryhole Millennials''
    I know @Stu has been searching for some ever since he got back from that parade in Belgium.
    So you might wanna let him know where you got those as well.:tup:



    But back on topic.
    Should I put the $$$ into R&D for the
    ''Hasslehoff, no hassle on or off, cock and ball day spa'' attachment as I discussed above?

    [​IMG]


    Then of course there is the whole 'what would The Jesus do?' question.

    [​IMG]

    This dude seems to have it sorted.

    [​IMG]

    Anyway, no one really gives a fuck about what day you ladies wash yr jockettes.
    Its all about the chaffed balls my friends.

    So lets put all our nuts together & see if we can help a brother out?
    FFS it might be mine or even your balls chaffing next time.

    Heres an idea, have your considered using Rick simpsons oil on yr balls?

    Then all you gotta do is rip out a pube or 2.
    Kaboom dab city!:rockon:

    :rofl::rofl::rofl:
     
  25. Stu

    Stu Maconheiro Staff Member

    Messages:
    5,887
    Location:
    Southeast of Disorder
    [​IMG]

    :peace:
     

Support FC, visit our trusted friends and sponsors