Name the Biggest Lie We Hear

[basement farmer]

Size doesn't matter..

 

[CarolKing]

We really do appreciate your business.

 

[Crohnie]

"Your call is very important to us."

 

[CarolKing]

As a teenager he says, " I'll only stick the tip in."

 

[Crohnie]

"I've never done this before."

 

[Snappo]

"I'm coumming"

 

[Radio]

" I need to find myself"

 

[Enchantre]

I wouldn't classify social niceties as "lies"... the "I'm fine", "Happy to see you", and "It's no problem" keeps us humming along without too much blood spilled.

But, as a matter of fact, when I told you that "No, I don't think you are an idiot", I lied. You are. "Thanks for calling" - not a lie, as my coworkers and I will chuckle about it. I will move on, though, and forget you. Maybe. Depends on just how big an idiot you were.

 

[Radio]

I wouldn't classify social niceties as "lies"... the "I'm fine", "Happy to see you", and "It's no problem" keeps us humming along without too much blood spilled.

But, as a matter of fact, when I told you that "No, I don't think you are an idiot", I lied. You are. "Thanks for calling" - not a lie, as my coworkers and I will chuckle about it. I will move on, though, and forget you. Maybe. Depends on just how big an idiot you were.

"I am sorry to hear that you feel that way" - no, i'm glad that you are being a total douche in response to the helpful advice i just gave you... go away and call again with a better attitude.

 

[smokum]

"trust me"

 

[grokit]

"Intelligence gathered by this and other governments leaves no doubt that the Iraq regime continues to possess and conceal some of the most lethal weapons ever devised."

 

[t-dub]

This thread was made for politicians . . .

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky."

 

[Radio]

"Half Life 3 will be released eventually"

 

[lwien]

"You'll go blind and grow hair on the palm of your hands if you keep doing that."

 

[Radio]

"I AM NOT A CROOK!"

 

[lwien]

This is a great thread. Thank you CK.

Here's one to add to the collection:

 

[CarolKing]

Sen. Craig," I just have a wide stance when sitting on the crapper."

 

[Crohnie]

"Ted Haggard is completely heterosexual."

 

[EveryDayAmnesiac]

"EveryDayAmnesiac is a nice guy, once you get to know him."

 

[CarolKing]

This product will take away your pain. Anything from Tommy Copper socks to Australian Dream Cream. Shame on Motel Williams for pushing these and being the paid actor for Tommy Copper. They prey on the desperate for relief. They take your money and laugh all the way to the bank. Montel should know better he has MS.

 

[basement farmer]

Russian soldiers have not occupied government buildings and surrounded Ukrainian military bases on the Crimean Peninsula

http://en.ria.ru/russia/20140304/188087074/Putin-Denies-Sending-Russian-Troops-to-Crimea.html

 

[CarolKing]

Man made climate change is a hoax. Every time there's a snowstorm folks like Rush Lindblaugh reminds us of that. Is it a lie or just plain stupidity?

 

[VANVAS]

If you cut the central stem of the plant of MJ and add a lsd you will a have a súper-psyhedelic plant! True or false?

 

[Silver420Surfer]

It tastes better than it smells. Trust me, it's really good shit.

 

[lwien]

Here's one to add to the collection:

So in a total contradiction to Senator's Larry Craigs statement and lie of, "I am not gay, nor have I EVER been gay", Tim Cook, Apples CEO just made this statement today: "I'm gay and I'm proud to be gay."

I know of no other CEO of a ANY large corporation like Apple to have ever done this, and so I say to Mr. Tim Cook..................
http://money.cnn.com/2014/10/30/technology/tim-cook-gay/index.html?hpt=hp_t1