cybrguy
Putin is a War Criminal
I rarely enjoy anxiety, although there is value in heightened awareness without the emotional component. There have certainly been circumstances in my life where the heightened awareness was not constructive, like after some heart attacks in the 90s where getting stoned caused me to focus too much on my heart and what it was doing. I had to relearn how to get high in a productive way where I was more in control. That is hopefully something we all learn to do over time.I get anxietyfeelings sometimes too, but I enjoy them. I mostly notice those kind of effects at parties. a big part of the fun of parties(the loud music, danciong and a lot of people packed together kind, not the actually-being-able-to-talk-because-there-is-backgroundmusic-and-couches-kind) is in overwhelmiong my own senses. and since weed makes me more aware, but also focus more on one thing, being stoned makes it easier to be overwhelmed by too much stimulation.
Alcohol on the other hand is a blunt instrument rather than a scalpel and alcohol has never given me more control over anything, whether it be my emotional state or my ability to drive. While giving up control to an external force may have its value now and again, generally speaking I seek more control not less and am unlikely to find much lack of control enjoyable today. Among my greatest fears is losing my faculties to Alzheimer's or other brain disease, and taking that for a ride doesn't seem like a pleasant experience to me.
I'm a little sorry to hear this as for me, that was probably the greatest positive of the more psychoactive drugs I took in my youth. Directing hallucinations was fun and all, but playing with my own head was the most fun. That was long ago now, and I doubt I would be as entertained by it today.I must really be the odd man out. With all of the psychoactive drugs that I have taken, be it cannabis, acid, peyote, shrooms, etc, I never get introspective. It's always about what's happening out there.