Busted by the wife... Ughhh

[Vitolo]

 

[farscaper]

Now that we have all been present...
...and have all walked through your experience with you..
I mean we stuck it out until resolution!
I have a special request.
I am an old guy.
I do not know what an iWatch is.
Explain what it is....
and then divulge how she was able to "look through" it and see that you vaped.
Do you store your meds in the iWatch?
Does the iWatch track and videotape your movements?
Go on @toked23
You have some "splainin" to do. spoken with Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz) imitation

I'd be concerned about the fact anyone was watching me through my wrist watch....

One of the watch’s features allows users to display a live preview of what your iPhone is shooting in real-time. Although the preview could be useful when snapping a posed photo with a friend, it could easily serve as a surveillance device if the subject is unaware of the iPhone filming them.

 

[syrupy]

Ha, now you have ammo for a return-fire of trust issue!

 

[toked23]

Ha, now you have ammo for a return-fire of trust issue!

Lol, nah. I'm going to take this one for the team. And since she isn't hating me and my ff2, I'm good to gooooooooooooo

 

[Hogni]

Nice wife who is reading your pm...ignorant....prejudiced....sounds all like a lot of trouble stuff. Wouldn't want to have a wife like this..

 

[crawdad]

some of us are into trouble stuff, it becomes part of the reward of life to have an intimate relationship with someone who can balance you, perhaps toked23 could use a little bit of honesty and this is simply one way (im projecting here, but am also speaking from experience).

 

[toked23]

Yeah, both of you are probably right. Because of my job I'm gone a lot and I guess the wife wonders a lot being home all the time taking care of the kids etc. I dont wonder about stuff or worry, I'm typically too busy. It's probably more idle time with her than reality. I'm very very independent and she is fairly dependent on me which is difficult for me at times. She really creates some things flat out of thin air in her mind. The prejudice towards mj is simply lack of knowledge and a bad experience with her personally. We are certainly not perfect but reality is we may have become closer because of this and a little stronger although it was never a situation of divorce or anything like that. Disappointed in me more than anything because I didn't tell her before.

 

[Vitolo]

I learned when I began using marijuana, that there are 3 reasons that separate Marijuana users into 3 types that "get high" with 3 separate stimuli that enhance the marijuana experience for them.
This is my feeling and others have other philosophies

1. The user who gets off on being sneaky...Getting high in bedroom without guardians of the home finding out. This user becomes addicted to using marijuana in public places and that becomes a satisfying part of the high... like public restrooms.
2. The user that gets off on the group experience. Like hippies in the 60s that enjoyed the fellowship, and passing a doob around the large circle. A "kumbaya" kind of person.
3. The user that likes the feeling of marijuana. This user might be in a house with a guardian, but will leave to a place of safety and get medicated. This user may be in a house full of hippies and a bunch of weed, and will walk off to take a few puffs of his own stuff, then rejoin the group.

This division of categories is not perfect, as some people enjoy company and some have no choice but to be sneaky.
The 3rd type of user is not anti social, just enjoys the marijuana experience for what it is without the addition of tension... or the need to "sway to the kumbaya".
I was always the third type.
I medicated alone or with one other individual, and in a place where there would be no getting caught by anyone that might object.

 

[Hogni]

toked, ok, so you have time enough to join your favourite refreshment undisturbed ;-)

 

[Krazy]

... using a non-glass, non-butane vape, as this will appear less antisocial than smoking a pipe or joint. I would not show her your fancy dabbing setup or glass/butane vape if you have a choice, to an outsider this looks like you've managed to make hippy herb into crack.

I'v had a lot of success in that regard with older medical users that I help out. Having them try a non drug fiend looking device suddenly makes it OK to them.

 

[Vaked420]

Yeah, both of you are probably right. Because of my job I'm gone a lot and I guess the wife wonders a lot being home all the time taking care of the kids etc. I dont wonder about stuff or worry, I'm typically too busy. It's probably more idle time with her than reality. I'm very very independent and she is fairly dependent on me which is difficult for me at times. She really creates some things flat out of thin air in her mind. The prejudice towards mj is simply lack of knowledge and a bad experience with her personally. We are certainly not perfect but reality is we may have become closer because of this and a little stronger although it was never a situation of divorce or anything like that. Disappointed in me more than anything because I didn't tell her before.

Seems like you learned the underlying relationship lesson haha. Just because you guys are getting by with this situation of feeling like she is dependant and you are not, and the fact that she feels the need to snoop and you feel the need to hide things isn't super healthy. I've recently been in a point where I've been delving into my deepest thoughts with my significant other and as hard as it has been we are closer than ever and happier than ever. If you can't feel comfortable enough around her to tell her something that you seemingly think is an extremely small thing, like picking up vaping again, then what else are you guys not going to talk about?

I'm glad you guys figured it out on this one and were able to quickly and easily come to a solution, but I'm betting she's still sitting around wondering what else there is youre hiding, if anything. Personally I would just take this as a point to reflect on your relationship and see what else you guys may not be talking about or agreeing on. If you can't be completely comfortable to talk about everything with the person you're supposed to be spending your life with then home can quickly become a very un-homey place

 

[throwawaytre3s]

I'm fortunate enough that my girlfriend was actually the second person I ever smoked with. I smoked with another friend for the first time the day before, then I said "Holy shit, I have to do with with X!".

 

[GetLeft]

If you can't be completely comfortable to talk about everything with the person you're supposed to be spending your life with then home can quickly become a very un-homey place

I often bite my tongue when this kind of thought is put out there. And sometimes I don't bite my tongue. My not biting at this moment is not intended as a show of disrespect toward anyone; life is necessarily complex and we need to acknowledge and respect the wide array of opinions that go into making it so complex. That is, I hope I am not offending by disagreeing.

Human relationships are complex. How can anyone be completely comfortable talking about everything with anyone? I don't care how close one human is to the next, we are still individuals, and what makes an individual an individual is her or his difference from other individuals. Some of those differences obviously attract some individuals to other individuals. Other differences might just as quickly repel one individual from another. The smart thing to do is to hide those things that might repel someone we don't want to repel. Or at least to 'be protective' of those things.

And let's not forget that whole time thing. If we're lucky, we get a good dose of it. And if we don't take proper advantage of it, we don't change. In that case, what you see now is what you get forever so by all means spill all the beans and live happily ever after. However, if we happen to live a little, we experience new things; we grow, we change. The person I am now is not the person who married my wife way back when. Same goes for her. Has she garnered a secret here and there along the way? I'm betting she has and that's fine by me. I'd be disappointed if she didn't. I've got a few of my own. Like I get high every day.

 

[ashtonford]

I often bite my tongue when this kind of thought is put out there. And sometimes I don't bite my tongue. My not biting at this moment is not intended as a show of disrespect toward anyone; life is necessarily complex and we need to acknowledge and respect the wide array of opinions that go into making it so complex. That is, I hope I am not offending by disagreeing.

Human relationships are complex. How can anyone be completely comfortable talking about everything with anyone? I don't care how close one human is to the next, we are still individuals, and what makes an individual an individual is her or his difference from other individuals. Some of those differences obviously attract some individuals to other individuals. Other differences might just as quickly repel one individual from another. The smart thing to do is to hide those things that might repel someone we don't want to repel. Or at least to 'be protective' of those things.

And let's not forget that whole time thing. If we're lucky, we get a good dose of it. And if we don't take proper advantage of it, we don't change. In that case, what you see now is what you get forever so by all means spill all the beans and live happily ever after. However, if we happen to live a little, we experience new things; we grow, we change. The person I am now is not the person who married my wife way back when. Same goes for her. Has she garnered a secret here and there along the way? I'm betting she has and that's fine by me. I'd be disappointed if she didn't. I've got a few of my own. Like I get high every day.

Totally agree with you. She had no right going snooping thru his stuff to start with. If she had a trust problem she should have been adult and just came out and asked him about it. As you say everyone in life has a secret or two. Iam so tired of the man being the bad person in a situation. Its not just him. He wouldn't have been hiding it from her if she had been understanding about it and acted like a wife not his mother.

 

[toked23]

So, a little update. Appreciate all the support and comments from everyone. Wifey has been pretty cool about it all. Even to the point of considering giving it a try one day before too long. Relationship is pretty strong although as you've read, we've had our issues and it's a work in progress. We all have our ups and downs though, but neither of us are going anywhere. I'm going to wear this woman's patience out for 50 more years or so, and I'm sure she's going to beat on me (figuratively) as well. It might not be the best all the time, but it'll be interesting, hahaha.