For the 4th time in my 50 years, I'm in love with someone. I'm simply not the kind of person who can casually date...it just doesn't work for me. The other 3 times I was in love, the person was either taken, or I knew they were wrong for me, no matter how much I loved them. This time is different. For the first time in my life, the guy I'm in love with is single and would be right for me. The problem is that it's a friend I've known since 1992. I've always loved him as a friend, but before about 6 months ago, I didn't think of him in a romantic sense. When I was young and foolish, I thought it was impossible to fall in love with someone like him who "wasn't my type." How wrong and shallow I was. Many years ago, he made a pass at me in what I assumed was a joking playful way. Looking back at it now, I'm not so sure he was joking. I have a terrible time picking up on romantic social clues. You pretty much have to hit me over the head with a hammer to get the message across. The worst agony is not being able to tell the person you love how you feel, but I'm not willing to risk our friendship to express it. This really sucks, I just wish I knew how to deal with it. Thanks guys, for letting me get this off my chest.