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How to piss clear in two days???

Discussion in 'Ask FC' started by Aimless Ryan, Apr 19, 2017.

  1. Aimless Ryan

    Aimless Ryan Came to read about grinders; fucked combustion

    Messages:
    924
    Location:
    Central Ohio
    I just found out I have an appointment at a pain clinic in two days. Chances are, even though I mostly only use cannabis as medicine, testing positive may cost me the chance I desperately need to receive real pain relief. That is, oxycodone; which I already know does wonders for me, without getting me remotely high. Anyone have any good tips for me?

    I have used cannabis very conservatively the last week or two; maybe 0.1 g per day. Probably less. In case that information helps.

    Thanks.
     
  2. SamuraiSam

    SamuraiSam Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    868
    Location:
    Tacoma, WA
    Synthetic urine, usually available at your local headshop. Decent kits come with a handwarmer to help keep the bladder warm.
     
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  3. Kozzmozz

    Kozzmozz Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    102
    Location:
    Belgium
    Work out a lot, go to the gym and to the sauna or any type of hot box => sweat it out. And I mean, really sweat it out.
    When I have exercised virigoursly, and had some decent vape workouts as well that week, I can often smell some weedy, cannabis smell in my sweat.


    More drastically, get your hands on blood thinners medicine, not recommended but will work.
    Stick with the sweaty part, and if you are not a very large person (no harm intended) you have better chances since THC sticks to fatty tissue.
     
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  4. VAPEHUNTER

    VAPEHUNTER Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    682
    Location:
    LAS VEGOOSE, NV
    This was posted by the Homie @Madcap79 a while back in a thread titled "need help passing a drug test"

    Good luck brother!
     
  5. Aimless Ryan

    Aimless Ryan Came to read about grinders; fucked combustion

    Messages:
    924
    Location:
    Central Ohio
    Thanks for such quick responses.

    I'll try to work out, but I pretty much can't. Which is actually one of many reasons why I need opioid medication. Following two horrible injuries last year, Percocet/oxycodone allowed me to become significantly less crippled than I was before the injuries. Then the oxycodone was gone. Then all the progress I had made was gone, too (almost immediately).

    I've made a couple recent videos to hopefully show some of the dramatic positive effects oxycodone has on me; mostly in hopes of helping other people in my condition, in case I am not around to share it later.

    1:12 preview of longer, more thorough video I made the other day:

    Click to play YouTube Video


    14:07 full uncut (but occasionally sped up) video:

    Click to play YouTube Video
     
  6. Kozzmozz

    Kozzmozz Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    102
    Location:
    Belgium
    Sorry for my ignorance, I could have known you had a serious condition.
    Very confronting to see this, I wish you would not have to go trough all this and that you would simply get your medicine and vape as much as you like. What harm could it do.

    On a more constructive note, I found your video very inspirational and I wish you sincerely the best.
    Try to go to go to a sauna or steam box whatever they are called where you live, normally those should be accessible for you and it can really help to become 'clean' quickly. Spend some hours in there (and for the love of god drink a lot of water before, after and during the process).
    I'm sure you can pull it off!

    Cheers
     
  7. ghost

    ghost Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    132
    Kind of off topic, but is this a new thing, or some sort of response to the heroin problems?

    I went a pain management clinic in OH for a bad injury maybe a decade ago, and there was no urine testing or anything like that. They just assessed you, and looked at your medical records and/or spoke to your other doctors and specialists and made the recommendation that they felt was appropriate.
     
  8. Aimless Ryan

    Aimless Ryan Came to read about grinders; fucked combustion

    Messages:
    924
    Location:
    Central Ohio
    @ghost Welcome to New Ohio. (I live 10 minutes from downtown Columbus.) Everyone seems to believe it has something to do with the "heroin problem," but if you take five minutes to research, it's easy to see that the "heroin problem" has almost nothing to do with it. The people abusing these drugs are probably mostly folks who stole them from someone with a legitimate need, or bought them from someone who stole them. This happened to me last summer, by someone who was paid to help me (home health aide).

    @Kozzmozz You didn't upset me or anything. Not even close. I'm glad you liked the video. I live in such a different reality now than I used to that I never know if my videos are at all interesting to other people. Especially because I don't know if the things that look obvious to me are even detectable by anyone else. And when I ask people on Facebook to give me some feedback, I get nothing.

    By the way, the more I watch it, the more I love the uncut video. I can almost see myself improve by the second. I was hoping the difference after 30 minutes would be dramatic, but it didn't end up working quite how I hoped. Fortunately, though, I can see a big difference 10 minutes later, and probably five minutes later, too.
     
  9. mephisto

    mephisto Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    977
    My friend has several spinal fusion(s) and needs pain management for opiate based pain relief. As I understand the system, a dirty test will disqualify a person from the pain management and enter their information into a database stating that they tested dirty. Best wishes to you @Aimless Ryan , my suggestion would be massive water consumption, supplemented with creatine and b-complex vitamins for color. If you want to pm me, I can provide further support.
     
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  10. Prolusio

    Prolusio Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    227
    Location:
    Canada
    I have no advice to contribute beyond that already provided by our kind FC friends.. But I just wanted to say I think it's absolute garbage you could be denied the assistance you need by testing positive for cannabis @Aimless Ryan! I'd think a Dr finding out their patient is suffering so much they are seeking other medication would be MORE motivation to provide their assistance, not reason to turn a person away! Ridiculous, thoughtless bureaucracy at it's finest.

    I wish you luck with your test @Aimless Ryan! I know it's not worth nearly as much as good advice, but I'll be rooting for your success.
     
  11. mephisto

    mephisto Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    977
    It would be nice to still live in a world that Dr.'s were driven by compassion and ethics. However, with the opiate problem we have nationally, the DEA is overseeing pain med handling at a microscopic level. Even if the Dr. wanted to prescribe opiates to a patient in need, the dirty test will haunt the patient forever.......
     
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  12. Madcap79

    Madcap79 Jack of all trades, master of none.

    Messages:
    2,426
    Location:
    STLish
    Haha.....With that 0% guarantee......I'm telling you though, it works for me.....numerous times.

    @Aimless Ryan I wish you the best brother. It's a shame that people who really need these medicines get fucked over. Positive vibes sent....
     
  13. Aimless Ryan

    Aimless Ryan Came to read about grinders; fucked combustion

    Messages:
    924
    Location:
    Central Ohio
    Thanks so much for the support, everyone. It really does help. I'm sitting on an exercise bike right now. (I don't know if I can physically operate it, though. I should find out in a minute.)

    I'd be inclined to think the following would be enough to get all I can eat for life. However, this is Ohio.

    April 27, 2016:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    June 17, 2016:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Yes, I am able to cry on command. I had a very shitty year, and this stuff is just the beginning. (Well, after the crippling MS.)

    Thankfully I have someone very respectable and credentialed on my side now, so I suspect this should work out for me; maybe even if I test positive in a couple days. That was not true for most of the last several months, though. Which is why my new videos don't look more like this one.

    Click to play YouTube Video
     
  14. jackmormon

    jackmormon Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    266
    Location:
    Big Love
    Ryan,

    Total BS that you have to go through this kind of shit to receive needed medical assistance. The UA situation with pain clinics is mostly driven by their insurance carrier. Various regulations in combo with insurance companies have turned pain management into a medical ghetto where it is not uncommon to be treated like a criminal just for some help.

    Anyways, as has already been mentioned synthetic urine is the only 100% safe bet. You will not be observed giving the sample at a pain clinic like you would if on parole/probation, etc. Fair warning though.....If you do sign up with the clinic they will likely continue to give you UAs and when they don't show any opiates in your system they will boot you for that. So the synthetic urine is entry only.

    Not sure if all the clinics in your area are like this one but maybe ask around?

    I have strong feelings on this subject due to my 71 year old aunt being treated the same way....She has lung cancer and the pain clinic makes her give UAs, bring the med bottles in for pill counts, etc. Fucking disgusting.
     
  15. ghost

    ghost Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    132

    Bummer, I'm really sorry to hear about your problems, man. Perhaps its due to your proximity to the college and all the kids there trying to game the system? I've honestly not heard of this type of thing from my friends in other parts of the state. (though I'm sure it happens)
     
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  16. CalyxSmokr

    CalyxSmokr Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    452
    This is a much different thread than I thought it would be. Fucked situation. I would delay the eval till I could piss clean if synthetic urine won't work. Giving real urine seems too risky.
     
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  17. biohacker

    biohacker Fucking Combustion Since 2006

    Messages:
    5,348
    Hey Ryan, hope you're doing ok man.. as you know i'm in a similar situation although I started my break 3 weeks ago. I anticipate that my pain clinic appointment will not be for another few weeks, but i've tested positive even 7 weeks after my last usage in the past. There are so many variables, but just based on what I know about your vaping history, I think you should consider the synthetic urine, because just pounding back water may or may not do the trick for you. I have passed a piss test strip doing the pounding water technique for 2 weeks, but as soon as I stopped pounding, I failed it again. I think the severe dilution could trigger alarm bells, so look into that (b vitamins or whatever i'm not sure).

    I don't think sweating it out will help much (tried to the extreme), and in fact could potentially worsen your chances. THC metabolites are fat soluble, so even exercising may or may not be beneficial. I've read something about eating alot of red meat and fats, but not sure on the rationale of this per se. I really think time is the main factor here, but i'll repost this from the CannaBreak thread just FYI on the many factors and variables that come into play here.

    God speed bro!

     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2017
  18. ZuruEpok

    ZuruEpok New Member

    Messages:
    1
    Since you live in near Columbus look up the store Water Beds and Stuff. They have synthetic called "the lil whiz". I have personally used it and can say it works. Just read all the instructions and everything should turn out fine.
     
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  19. Madcap79

    Madcap79 Jack of all trades, master of none.

    Messages:
    2,426
    Location:
    STLish
    I just must be really lucky at passing UA's with water.
     
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  20. CarolKing

    CarolKing Singer of songs and a vapor connoisseur

    @Aimless Ryan Why not put off going in as long as you can. Maybe you come down with the flu? Maybe you won't be able to go in for a week or so? A little extra time might help since you haven't been using a lot. Just a thought.:2c: really wishing you the best with all this. It's such BS that you have to go through this.
     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2017
  21. me2

    me2 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    47
    last resort if you cant just postpone the appointment as carolking suggested is to show for the appointment without any id or supporting documents.
    they cant test without an id.
    no way to prove you are you.
     
  22. Hpx567

    Hpx567 New Member

    Messages:
    1
    I would suggest trying to delay it and doing everything to get clean. Worst comes to worst you fail the test. If so while I advocate nothing there are still many places online you could get the medication you need. It is usually very safe as long as you take the proper steps, however nothing is 100 percent.
     
  23. biohacker

    biohacker Fucking Combustion Since 2006

    Messages:
    5,348
    Happy 4/20 Ryan.... this is my second 4/20 being on a break! I agree with the stall/delay tactics... that's my plan should I get my phone call earlier than I anticipate. Even just a couple of weeks will make a massive difference. :peace:
     
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  24. Aimless Ryan

    Aimless Ryan Came to read about grinders; fucked combustion

    Messages:
    924
    Location:
    Central Ohio
    Just starting this thread and receiving this support from all you guys has removed a lot of stress (and blown my mind), even though I think I have pretty much decided my only strategy will be to just not consume any more herbs until after my appointment tomorrow. (I didn't consume any yesterday.) Especially because I've had the impression that a lot of people here kinda look down on opioids (similar to how people here look down on combustion), and because I know I can be a little bitch (although I never seem to know it until some time has passed). Thank you all so much.

    I know I look chipper (and 30) in the videos, but I desperately need to start this process ASAP. If I don't, I don't know what I might end up doing to myself (or what gravity might do to me first). I have been in so much pain for so long—even before I was aware of the pain—and it blows my mind that I haven't received the help I need, considering my obvious pain and metal body parts and whatnot. Even though I have had a small supply of pain relief the last several weeks, it hasn't been enough (because at this point I only use enough to make the unending pain kinda bearable). And all I want is enough to allow me to be on my feet safely when I choose to (probably 30 mg per day), so I can exercise and take care of myself, and maybe be able to live again. Damn near everyone in my suburb probably knows who I am from the months last year when I spent hours almost every day exercising on a sidewalk/bridge beside a very busy road in my neighborhood. (I wouldn't be surprised if there ends up being someone here who knows exactly who I am, specifically because of that.)

    This is mostly a safety issue to me, although oxycodone helps me in so many other ways. I mean, if I had been taking oxycodone a year ago (instead of seven days less than a year ago), I most certainly wouldn't have broken my leg. Which means I also wouldn't have burned my leg/ass/dick seven weeks later. (I can explain some other time.) Those two injuries are the worst two things that have ever happened to me. And one of them made possible the ridiculously illegal search/seizure, as well as the theft of my Percocet, oxycodone, and Adderall. (And this theft happened after I shared my medicine with her and allowed her to experience vapor for the first time, from an Herbalizer.)

    As horrible and painful as my injuries were (and still are), though, they may have saved my life. Because I don't think I had ever taken opioids before that, except for a small amount of hydrocodone a couple years earlier, when I was in less of a position to recognize how much they help me (because my disability was much less progressed at that point, and because of the small quantity). Due to all the pain from last year's injuries, I've also learned that much of what we're told about evil opioids is total bullshit. I can't say how this is for anyone else, but from my point of view, it looks like the only way to be harmed by opioids is to intentionally use them to get high (or be overprescribed by dumbfuck doctors). I've never been high on opioids. When something like that helps you as much as it helps me, particularly in the current social and political climate, using it to get high is not an option. (I wouldn't want to get high on it anyway.)

    I don't hide anything from the person who has helped me get this far. This person is nearly 100% responsible for the help I have already received lately. I have plenty of other reasons to trust this person, too. I want to explain, but I feel like this is probably something I shouldn't talk about publicly; even though everything I could say about this person's assistance should be universally interpreted as heroism.

    Happy 4/20, everyone!
     
  25. steama

    steama Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,236
    The best way to go is synthetic urine as was mentioned above. If you are going to attempt the dilution method don't over do drinking water. Do not flush your system days before your test, it doesn't help and is a waste of time. A couple of days before your test begin taking some riboflavin (vitamin B2) to color your diluted urine yellow. Clear urine is often a reason the drug testing monitor may fail your drug test. On the day of your test, 3 to 4 hours before your test, drink water until you are sure you are pissing nothing but water. About one hour before your test, drink another quart of water and make sure you have to go. When pissing into the test cup make sure at the beginning of your urine stream to piss into the toilet. Piss into the test jar 'mid stream' and empty the last of the piss into the toilet. The reason for this is the most THC metabolites are most concentrated in the beginning of the urine stream and at the end. Mid stream urine is the most clean.

    Stop working out at least a couple of days before your test. THC metabolites are stored in the body fat. Exercising close to or before your test will release more THC metabolites into your urine and blood. Dilution in my opinion is an excellent way to go, but remember, if you have been using herb do not be shocked if you fail the test. I have had many urine tests (50+) and have failed only one. I did not use the dilution method on the test I failed.

    Good luck and keep your fingers crossed. If you can get some synthetic urine that is the best way to go.

    http://www.thewhizzinator.com/
     
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