Anyone got cats?

[Ricardo]

So, we have two cats who roam freely around my property ..... but also visit the neighbors on either side . Well, they've started crapping where they aren't welcome and last night I discovered a nice collection of turds that somebody returned to us over the wall

These are the facts:
1. I don't know which neighbor it is, but if his first response was to climb up on a flat roof in order to throw it back at us then I'm guessing he/she is not interested in talking this through.
2. I can't keep them out of next door except by locking them up inside.
3. We have an alternative home for the cats (roaming free in the country with their extended cat family), where we can check up on them a couple of times a week BUT my wife wants to keep them here
4. The neighbor is growing 4 little cannabis plants
5. I can get very angry when I feel my reasonable arguments are not taken into consideration.
6. There are two types of response online ....
a) (Pet owners' forum): Cats are innocent creatures and cannot be restricted by property boundaries - try to work together to find a solution. (This is sooo not going to happen ....)
b) (Car enthusiasts' forum): Cats and their owners are filthy, selfish sons of bitches and should all be stuffed in bags and thrown in the sea.

 

[Vapordeflor]

I have a cat and keep her inside the house... Otherwise she would roam on a very busy village with lots of roads and cars... Maybe im just a monster.. hehe. Just curious about the "cars enthusiasts forum" is it "forocoches" hahahaha.

 

[Ricardo]

I have a cat and keep her inside the house... Otherwise she would roam on a very busy village with lots of roads and cars... Maybe im just a monster.. hehe. Just curious about the "cars enthusiasts forum" is it "forocoches" hahahaha.

It is Forocoches!!!! These guys have strong opinions on everything, mostly immigration, very VOX . It's like Top Gear con cojones
EDIT: To clarify, those were the results on the first page of a Google search...I am not a Forocoches member/contributor, but it is important to be aware of all points of view, right?

 

[arb]

What do them having cannabis plants on their property have to do with you being a irresponsible pet owner?

 

[Ricardo]

What do them having cannabis plants on their property have to do with you being a irresponsible pet owner?

Only that I thought that fellow marijuana aficionados might be able to sit down and talk things through over a Vapcap...... rather than passive aggressive anonymous chucking of shit over the wall. Granted, it was our cats' shit but.....
And, I'm not an irresponsible pet owner. I would be if I'd known it was happening and ignored it. But the first I knew about it was the (literal) shit shower that fell on my roof yesterday evening

 

[Roth]

Your cats don't bury their shit?

Savages!

 

[Ricardo]

Your cats don't bury their shit?

Oh, they certainly do. But my worry is that they do it in the specially prepared, pH balanced soil the neighbor leaves out to later add to his pot plants. My guess is that he was sifting through that and came across the deposits. I doubt that he's been saving them up day by day - we got about a week's supply returned yesterday. A CSI analysis suggests a parabolic curve consistent with being flung up in the air and falling at an approx 60· angle over a 5 metre spread, while minimal splatter suggests no fresh deposits.

 

[arb]

 

[pxl_jockey]

I know you’re seriously dealing with a genuine pet dilemma and dealing with neighbors is a real world-class stressor, but honestly @Ricardo I’ve been in need of a good laugh and your excellent prose has been the most wonderful medicine indeed! And I love the sentiment that as cannabis lovers there should be an intrinsic respect and willingness to cooperate, ya old hippie.

My advice would be to take swimming lessons and just buy two tiny life-jackets for the cats. Just for the “urban” cats, of course! I’m not suggesting for the country cats as well, let’s not be ridiculous! And surely as a reasonable person and vigilant citizen, you must prepare for all eventualities, up to and including your kidnapping, abduction and maritime murder at the hands of a secret cabal of cat/owner-hating fascists.

Promise me & all of us that there will be further episodes of CSI: Cat Shit Investigation! I believe there’s still more story here and perhaps even a moment of redemption and resolution for our protagonist, @Ricardo ? Or will the mute rage-neighbour continue climbing walls and chucking poo? This could be huge! An HBO show?! Don’t you dare misunderestimate that viewers worldwide will identify & connect with the heart of your story. And don’t you dare settle for the first offer those Showtime bastards throw at ya!

 

[Ricardo]

CatShIt:ISLAND UPDATE!

• Cats accept provisional voluntary house detention as investigations continue.
• Local sources identify outraged shit-slinger as respected local fire-fighter and president of adjoining building residents' association.
• Ricardo household posts handwritten letter of apology on neighboring wall offering clean-up support and mutual respect and cooperation moving forward.

More to follow.

 

[grampa_herb]

Tough situation. I've seen inside cats become outside cats, but not vice-versa. Good luck!

As kids we used to catch sand-burrowing lizards, and every once in a while would pull up a stinky mess of cat-poop and sand. Then the one-handed bike ride back home would start...

 

[Ricardo]

As kids we used to catch sand-burrowing lizards, and every once in a while would pull up a stinky mess of cat-poop and sand. Then the one-handed bike ride back home would start...

There is so much that requires explaining here..... but mostly why?

 

[grampa_herb]

There is so much that requires explaining here..... but mostly why?

Cuz they are so cute and can squirt blood from their eyes, but a pic speaks a thousand words.

 

[shredder]

I wouldn't want your cats around my plants either. Full discloser, we own 2 cats, 2 dogs and 9 chickens. Hopefully you can come to some kind of agreement, but it is your neighbors property, and it is your cats crapping there.

 

[Ricardo]

Cuz they are so cute and can squirt blood from their eyes, but a pic speaks a thousand words.

I get that much. But why would you squeeze so many that you'd sometimes squeeze cat shit by mistake? And why would the cats shit there anyway? Do they prey on the lizards, and then crap them out on the spot? There must have been droves of cats.
And why would you not rinse your hand before riding the bike home? Was that part of the challenge - one-handed biking and first one to wash his hand loses?

 

[grampa_herb]

I get that much. But why would you squeeze so many that you'd sometimes squeeze cat shit by mistake? And why would the cats shit there anyway? Do they prey on the lizards, and then crap them out on the spot? There must have been droves of cats.
And why would you not rinse your hand before riding the bike home? Was that part of the challenge - one-handed biking and first one to wash his hand loses?

We would bike to a sandy area and shove our hands into the sand where it looked like there had been some recent activity. If lucky it was a lizard, but sometimes it was a cat turd. Since we were just dumb little kids we were not prepared and had to bike home one-handed so as not to touch anything with a cat-shit-infected hand.

 

[Buzzbomb Almighty]

I have friends who cat-proofed their fence so their 5 or 6 or 8 can't get out of the back yard, and have access to the house through a cat flap.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Yorkshireman who was wearing a cat flap?

 

[Dank_Star]

As cat lovers Mrs dank_star and I sympathise with your plight. She reckons that if your neighbour leaves some lemon peel around his garden it should act as a deterrent to your cats...Hope this helps

 

[Ricardo]

CatShIt:ISLAND - BREAKING NEWS​

• Tensions ease on western front as shit-slinging neighbor expresses shame at "overreactive behavior"; pledges to work with Ricardo household for future harmonious relationship.
• Celebrations muted as observers on Eastern border note increased activity following reinstatement of ousted spouse at adjoining property.
• Cats "cooperative but restless". Support grows as reports emerge of underlying illness (FeLV).

• 

 

[Ramahs]

Depends on my financial stability. If I can afford it, I'd first look into anonymously paying for a load of manure to be dumped in the middle of the entrance of their driveway (bonus if it's the only entrance).

Then hijinks would ensue....

 

[Ricardo]

I have friends who cat-proofed their fence so their 5 or 6 or 8 can't get out of the back yard, and have access to the house through a cat flap.

A little too Guantanamo for my tastes, but cheers

I probably prefer this Aussie solution, although my topography is not ideal....

 

[Vapordeflor]

I know you’re seriously dealing with a genuine pet dilemma and dealing with neighbors is a real world-class stressor, but honestly @Ricardo I’ve been in need of a good laugh and your excellent prose has been the most wonderful medicine indeed! And I love the sentiment that as cannabis lovers there should be an intrinsic respect and willingness to cooperate, ya old hippie.

My advice would be to take swimming lessons and just buy two tiny life-jackets for the cats. Just for the “urban” cats, of course! I’m not suggesting for the country cats as well, let’s not be ridiculous! And surely as a reasonable person and vigilant citizen, you must prepare for all eventualities, up to and including your kidnapping, abduction and maritime murder at the hands of a secret cabal of cat/owner-hating fascists.

Promise me & all of us that there will be further episodes of CSI: Cat Shit Investigation! I believe there’s still more story here and perhaps even a moment of redemption and resolution for our protagonist, @Ricardo ? Or will the mute rage-neighbour continue climbing walls and chucking poo? This could be huge! An HBO show?! Don’t you dare misunderestimate that viewers worldwide will identify & connect with the heart of your story. And don’t you dare settle for the first offer those Showtime bastards throw at ya!

I nearly peed myself there

 

[pxl_jockey]

@grampa_herb did you grow up in the Texas Panhandle or West Texas? You gotta be a certain vintage to fondly remember horny toads! I guess properly the Horned Lizard IIRC... very rare now due to pesticides and the invading fire ants from Mexico. Please don’t draw any parallels to current noxious politics.

LOL!! “cat shit-infected hand”

Ah, the times when, from a child’s perspective, it almost seemed like parental negligence and Darwin’s Natural Selection were government programs involving tax breaks.

“Get out of the house! Go play! Don’t come home until dinner. And if you get hurt, do not track mud or blood on my clean kitchen floor!”

“But what if I’m really hurt and dying?!”

“Your father and I can always make more.”

@Ricardo your kitties are beautiful, but they do appear a little pissed off. At the very least, perturbed. Sorry to hear about the underlying illnesses, been there with cats in the past. We don’t have any kitties but have had many through the years and I do love them, along with most animals. I’ve walked dogs (ours & others’) in our village so long that all of the outdoor cats have learned that I insist that dogs with me must respect all cats right to exist. No foolishness.

So of course, they come out very close and begin cleaning or lie down and make themselves vulnerable, basically pretending the dogs aren’t there. This really irritates the dogs until they learn to pretend like the cats aren’t there. Which is my desired goal as the hooman in charge!

 

[grampa_herb]

@grampa_herb did you grow up in the Texas Panhandle or West Texas? You gotta be a certain vintage to fondly remember horny toads! I guess properly the Horned Lizard IIRC... very rare now due to pesticides and the invading fire ants from Mexico.

I grew up in Denver and we would catch them in vacant lots right in the city in the late 60's. Sad they are endangered now. The last one I saw was at Horseshoe Bend, AZ.

Coyotes are everywhere in this city. Had a cat years ago whose fate it was to end up as a coyote meal, we believe. My GF decided to let the cat out one day. I told her you can't put that back in the bottle....

 

[Buzzbomb Almighty]

Coyotes are everywhere in this city.

A coyote ate my friend's cat in the middle of East Vancouver; they're everywhere.