Fuck the Parkinson's, the Dr just gave me a reason to smoke MORE!

momofthegoons

vapor accessory addict
Lol... pink tights? I thought it was pink skirts!

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Meanwhile, I'm just trying to get in some quality reading at the game....

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momofthegoons

vapor accessory addict
I try really hard not to be a whiner. Really, really hard, lol. But... I've reached my limit this week. So since this is the thread that we use to vent... (I'm not quite at the Fuck You point yet)......

So okay... my daughter is getting married this weekend. And that is a wonderful thing in itself.. however she suffers from anxiety and the lead up to this weekend has been hell. It doesn't help that we've had people canceling at the last minute, deciding to come (after responding no) at the last minute... and the weather is unseasonably cold and might rain. For our outside ceremony.

Now these are just a couple of things that have gone awry (I refuse to say wrong!) this week. We've had to redo printing of escort/place cards because of seating arrangements being changed by numbers coming. The mother of the groom is a momzilla... and wants to be included in every nuance of the weekend; much to my daughter's dismay. Suitcases have been lost, shipments delayed, we've had issues with our musician/dj.... god the list goes on and on.

So after a very stressful day yesterday, my poor daughter fell apart in the car on the way home from manicures. Not even that had gone smoothly, lol...

Only one thing to do at this point.

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Then I hit my vapor station with a vengeance. Today is the rehearsal... and by the end of the day, I have a feeling that I will be the point where I would give a blow job for a Xanax...... :p

Wish me luck folks.

Serenity Now!!!!!!!!!!!
 

dorkus_molorkus

Well-Known Member
I will be the point where I would give a blow job for a Xanax...... :p


images

and here I am sitting all alone at home.


wow................. this is awkward.

After much deliberation, I have decided that if you have dentures, Im in.
(as long as the dentures are out when the transaction goes down.:tup:)


BTW- out of concern for your well being, I have taken the liberty of handing out xanax at the door to all the guests for the evening. The bloke with the colostomy bag was especially enthused.
For your modesty I am currently organizing a 'gloryhole' to be cut in the toilet door.
Perhaps some sort of shower cap might be in order? I assume you will be getting yr hair done right?

Anyhoo, I cant wait.
Here in Oz this sort of thing is normally performed by one of the drunken bridesmaids sometime around the time the speeches are taking place.

But wow the bride mother doing the honors? You crazy nthn mexicans sure know how to party.

Im not too sure if I'll be able to look you in the eye again, but hey Im only going to soak up the culture anyway.



FYI- it might be best if you stay away from any UV lights


Best of luck with it all.

Remember pics or it didnt happen!
 

MinnBobber

Well-Known Member
So @dorkus_molorkus , talk on the street is you beamed on over for the wedding.
How was it?

I also understand you got pretty wasted and and in your stupor, found momzilla to be the hot ticket....
I know you don't kiss and tell, but how was the old gal?

@momofthegoons , hope all went well / is going well at the wedding.
It will be a nice feeling when it's all over and all the hard work is behind you.

Keep hoping for the day when many weddings will have a cannabis bar.....
 

momofthegoons

vapor accessory addict
Ah @dorkus_molorkus .... as I lay here nursing my sore feet, I find myself immensely thankful that I am able to bring out the creative side of you. :D

Fortunately, I did not did not need the Xanax and didn't have to succumb to 'the task' after all. Tequila did the trick. Tequila and a wedding planner the likes of which you may have seen in the Steve Martin version of 'Father of the Bride.' OMG! This little 'boy' was fierce! He even had my #1 goon trembling in his boots.

But after the party started? My party planner turned into a party animal. I had more than one person ask me if he was a professional dancer. He had those bridesmaids swirling around the floor. And then he turned his eye on me. Dear God. I haven't moved like that in a few years. I even got dipped, lol.

All in all a wonderful evening. Thanks everyone for the well wishes. :luv: Including you dorkus, lol.....
 
@momofthegoons congratulations on the family celebration, the beautiful glasses from @mvapes, the new addition to the family. I don't ever recall speaking directly to you but I've followed your moderations and gut bursting humor for some time and I feel like I know you. I'm glad your weekend was magical for your daughter and full of memories for you.
@dorkus_molorkus...... I'd be afraid to meet this guy, but I'm sure no one parties like you! Unfortunately as a grown ass man, I must admit your ideas
of fun are frightening. Entertaining to read but scary to envision! I don't know what FC would be like without you. Then again, probably Rated P.G!
P,S that party planner was on his JOB!!!
 

MinnBobber

Well-Known Member
:) I just had a talk with one of my favorite goons, @dorkus_molorkus . And, as much as I would love to take credit for this little gem, I think those of you who know me would see right through the charade. Yes... you would know right where this had come from...
...............................................
Thanks dorkus and momotg,

I'm more of a do-it-yourself guy so I avoid the middleman and just wear my wife's high heels when I sit on the pot ;)
 

Enchantre

Oil Painter
:) I just had a talk with one of my favorite goons, @dorkus_molorkus . And, as much as I would love to take credit for this little gem, I think those of you who know me would see right through the charade. Yes... you would know right where this had come from...

So without further adieu...

Fuck. Right now, on my clipboard, is that very same link.

Curses. Foiled again.

Fine. Remember... it's fresh from the sphincter...

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