Why Do <YOU> Get Vaped?

For fun, I wanted to start a thread thats dedicated to vaping and the reasons why we do.
Some of us medicate necessarily, some of us choose it over rx drugs, some just like to relax, and others see it as recreation.
I myself am curious what traits/characteristics/issues many of us may share......and in theory threads like this can bring a "community"closer.
End lifetime movie style


So, whats up? Me, start?
OK

One thread rule - no judgement

I have anxiety and ive found I use less rx medication necessarily and I also suffered from depression/adhd (undiagnosed early) and its done wonders.
My former medium tobacco use was a worry, but the expectorant effects feel magical.
I write, record, mix, perform music, alternative hip hop, and it helps my creativity like no other.
Combine all that.....im your typical artist.
It helps me focus and when i use properly Im more productive. Its opened my way of thinking.

This is both towards herb and vape I guess, but without vape breath control, lung relief, etc......would be void.

Show appreciation and share stories people! I'm a nosy bastard....

Oh yea, and damn my non mmj state. Legalize it Dammit.

Cool thread man! I am a lot like you, i vape for a couple different reasons medically i vape for pain and anti-inflammatory to combat my arthritis from my car accident. I also use it to relax and like you visiblyvaped i am really into hiphop and music (was more before i had my kids, different lifestyles ya know). I find theres nothin like a good sativa to get some creative juices flowing for writing and freestyling. I also find i lke vaping just to vape i love blowing out big huge clouds, the feeling of clearing a tube, the lung expansion, etc

Puffers said:

Cool thread man! I am a lot like you man i vape for a couple different reasons medically i vape for pain and anti-inflammatory to combat my arthritis from my car accident. I also use it to relax and like you visiblyvaped i am really into hiphop and music (was more before i had my kids, different lifestyles ya know). I find theres nothin like a good sativa to get some creative juices flowing for writing and freestyling. I also find i lke vaping just to vape i love blowing out big huge clouds, the feeling of clearing a tube, the lung expansion, etc

Click to expand...

Thanks man, I hope it catches on....that'd be cool to me.

It's so much better than taking a lighter to it. I just feel better, and then you get a bunch of potent edibles.
And music wise, songwriting. There's nothing better.....

I have a minor medical reason, I'm crosseyed, no azy eye but I don't look with both eyes at the same time, I subconscieusly alternate with wich eye I look. except if I'm high I discovered one day, I was playing with a bottlecap and held it in front of my eye, and noticed I could look trough(the effect that you see the cap with one eye but also see what's behind it with the other eye)
I started paying attention to it and noticed that everytime I was high I looked with both eyes(I was already at the point that I could look with both eyes for years, but I had to pay attention to it, focus on it and only be able to sustain it for a litlle while, if I'm high I look with both eyes without paying any attention to it, or any effort)
and now I notice that now I'm a daily vaporist(weekly combuster before I switched to vaping, wich is about 2 years ago) I often even look with both eyes when I'm not high
but if I abstain for a longer period of time I start lookin with one eye again.
sativa's work best, since indica's also make me tired, and that has the opposite effect(usually even if I look with one eye you can't really see it, but when I'm tired, especially with alcohol involved too, one of my eyelids starts hanging more etc)

but that's just a minor thing for me, a nice side-effect.
I also like it to relax, and to makes me think faster and better. it makes me do thins I was piling up for a while(so I'm more productive while high since I have more motivation to do stuff)
it makes me able to really o up into an activity, be completely absorbed in it and forget the world around me. as a kid I could do that with reading, but that disappeared and I have it missed since, only while ardening I can achieve that to some degree, gardening while high and I'm completely zoned out getting back to reality a few hours later in a very relaxed and happy mood.(and with a lot of weeds removed and other gardenwork done)

weed also makes my sleeping pattern more adaptable. if I have no obliation etc and I can follow my own rhym, I o to sleep at 4-6 at night(some would call it mornin), and sleep till 12-2 in the afternoon. if I have to wake up early I'm sleepy/not wel rested all day, no matter how lon I sleep(while in my own pattern I only need 6-7 hours sleep, but when waking up early even 8-9 is not enough)
but, if I vaped the night before I can get out of bed more easily, get started up quicker in the morning and don't feel as bad troughout the day(altough it still feels way better to sleep in my own pattern)

weed also makes me seek less confrontation, I can sometimes get into fights with authority figures about ridiculous rules I don't agree with, weed makes it easier to shrug it off. I can still be pushed too far, but my annoyance-tolerance is higher.
my tolerance to idiots and stupidity and just ridiculousness in everydaylife are also not so annoyin anymore

and finally I like the social aspects of cannabis, I have met a lot of people trouch weed, sometimes with mutual friends but I've also smoked with random strangers. weed takes away the akwardness of not knowing someone. and most stoners are easy to get along with.
I also like being high as an excuse, I can sometimes act a little akward, and forget things like names, but people who know I vape just think I'm high in those cases. and for that reason weed can also give me more confidence, since it's okay to be/act weird/strange etc if I'm high

djonkoman said:

I have a minor medical reason, I'm crosseyed, no azy eye but I don't look with both eyes at the same time, I subconscieusly alternate with wich eye I look. except if I'm high I discovered one day, I was playing with a bottlecap and held it in front of my eye, and noticed I could look trough(the effect that you see the cap with one eye but also see what's behind it with the other eye)
I started paying attention to it and noticed that everytime I was high I looked with both eyes(I was already at the point that I could look with both eyes for years, but I had to pay attention to it, focus on it and only be able to sustain it for a litlle while, if I'm high I look with both eyes without paying any attention to it, or any effort)
and now I notice that now I'm a daily vaporist(weekly combuster before I switched to vaping, wich is about 2 years ago) I often even look with both eyes when I'm not high
but if I abstain for a longer period of time I start lookin with one eye again.
sativa's work best, since indica's also make me tired, and that has the opposite effect(usually even if I look with one eye you can't really see it, but when I'm tired, especially with alcohol involved too, one of my eyelids starts hanging more etc)

but that's just a minor thing for me, a nice side-effect.
I also like it to relax, and to makes me think faster and better. it makes me do thins I was piling up for a while(so I'm more productive while high since I have more motivation to do stuff)
it makes me able to really o up into an activity, be completely absorbed in it and forget the world around me. as a kid I could do that with reading, but that disappeared and I have it missed since, only while ardening I can achieve that to some degree, gardening while high and I'm completely zoned out getting back to reality a few hours later in a very relaxed and happy mood.(and with a lot of weeds removed and other gardenwork done)

weed also makes my sleeping pattern more adaptable. if I have no obliation etc and I can follow my own rhym, I o to sleep at 4-6 at night(some would call it mornin), and sleep till 12-2 in the afternoon. if I have to wake up early I'm sleepy/not wel rested all day, no matter how lon I sleep(while in my own pattern I only need 6-7 hours sleep, but when waking up early even 8-9 is not enough)
but, if I vaped the night before I can get out of bed more easily, get started up quicker in the morning and don't feel as bad troughout the day(altough it still feels way better to sleep in my own pattern)

weed also makes me seek less confrontation, I can sometimes get into fights with authority figures about ridiculous rules I don't agree with, weed makes it easier to shrug it off. I can still be pushed too far, but my annoyance-tolerance is higher.
my tolerance to idiots and stupidity and just ridiculousness in everydaylife are also not so annoyin anymore

and finally I like the social aspects of cannabis, I have met a lot of people trouch weed, sometimes with mutual friends but I've also smoked with random strangers. weed takes away the akwardness of not knowing someone. and most stoners are easy to get along with.
I also like being high as an excuse, I can sometimes act a little akward, and forget things like names, but people who know I vape just think I'm high in those cases. and for that reason weed can also give me more confidence, since it's okay to be/act weird/strange etc if I'm high

Click to expand...

The posts thus far are the reason i made this thread....

For the most part to relax and to giving me a sensory overload when I'm out in nature.

In addition as a sleep aid.

Combat PTSD , Traumatic Brain Injury and lower back pain. I have had bad expriecences with both opiates and benzos , thus weed.

djonkoman said:

and finally I like the social aspects of cannabis, I have met a lot of people trouch weed, sometimes with mutual friends but I've also smoked with random strangers. weed takes away the akwardness of not knowing someone. and most stoners are easy to get along with.
I also like being high as an excuse, I can sometimes act a little akward, and forget things like names, but people who know I vape just think I'm high in those cases. and for that reason weed can also give me more confidence, since it's okay to be/act weird/strange etc if I'm high

Click to expand...

QFT
I too have known so many interesting individuals through the herb! It has helped me opening up my eyes towards society, it has changed many beliefs....since I started using MJ I can say I became a different person...a better person I guess. It may not be the only reason but I think it helps in reasoning and taking the best decisions, for us, and in relation to others too!
Ganja boosted my music creation as already said by the OP, I do produce for fun, electronic music of different kinds, and I started practicing with drums. You can get so creative while high....it's crazy
I vape when I get home from work, to relax and lessen the daily troubles, to travel with my thoughts and in general because I like really much the stateofmind.
Djonko said it right, using the high as an excuse for some extravagant attitude is the best, I have always been kinda weird in my behaviour, in a funny way, and becoming a "pothead" only enhanced the funny and good side of this trait, it makes your attitude really interesting to others, in a positive way

The herb helps us to spread love!

for me its a method of aligning my self with my environment without external hindrances...pure me in total awareness. its my flashlight in this dim universe for which to see further and deeper. well, that and i guess everything else too.

anxiety

this is an umbrella for things that weed can help me with
- nausea and appetite
- over thinking/worrying
- inability to get to sleep at night
- relaxing and calming

non medicinal reason is because it's fun.
but in all honestly I feel like I have been self medicating (as well as being a recreational user) the last 12 years now.

I'm a photographer at heart and being high really inspires me. My best work comes from being high and walking around by myself in the woods. getting a chance to reconnect with the "real world" not this concrete, glass, steel and plastic wasteland we call home lol!

It has pretty much outright annihilated my joint pain. I also partially credit this to the regular consumption of reasonable amounts of beer, as hops have long been known to help with this issue.

While I don't feel comfortable going into my own reasons, I'll share with you what I told my (very anti-mmj) sister at Thanksgiving.

Sister: "Why did the doctor give you a recomendation for weed?"
Me: "Anxiety"
Sister: "What makes you so anxious?"
Me: "Lack of weed"

I only said it to infuriate her and 'cause it's fun to fuck with siblings.

I vape so all them other muthafuckers can live, otherwise I'd go all postal on their asses.

God damn cut me off in traffic cocksucker! Its a good thing for you that I just vaped 1-1.2gr of some dank shit & am too fucked up to come & try to remember why I'm so pissed off with you..........
Hey you gonna eat that cheeseburger bro??



but this is the real reason,

copied & pasted from another thread here that I'm too baked to work out how to link it.
The question here was '' is there any reason why i shouldnt vape all day, everyday?''
this was my reply.......


I have been stoned since I was 18 yo & Im 40 now. If I am to be totally honest, I was hopelssly addicted to MJ from the very beginning. I will toke up the second my eyes open and stop when I go to sleep.

I have tried many times over the last 20years to give up, I have hidden my habit mostly. I am not really a social smoker, I do my thing quietly & discreetly on my own. My wife (before she was my wife), made it very clear that she didnt approve of my pot use. When I met her I was in a giving up stage, but then as we spent time together the MJ crept its way back in my life.

I have been a wake n baker for all that time. And my fav method of delivery was gravity/ bucket bong. 4-6 of them 1st thing in the morning forever was the norm & if I could get away with it, I would bong on all day, all night. at work, at my mums, in the car before the movies or restaurant, and then after the movies or restaurant.
I took my drivers test stoned, got my forklift ticket stoned, got married, went to all my job interviews stoned, managed 20+ people on a day to day basis, hired, fired, ran my own business, you name it, always stoned, all the time.

I have tried to give up for my health, I have tried to give up for my wallet, I have tried to give up for my self esteem (by not being a drug addict & despised being a slave to a substance), I have tried to give up cause I was sick of it being difficult to obtain & getting ripped off, and making me feel like a drug addict when I would run around like a fuckwit in order to score.

my worst nightmare is a T-break

But it has come to dawn on me & my wife, that I have never tried to give up for me.
Because I dont want to.............. I love it, I just love being stoned, all the time. Sure the motivation thing always needs work, but other than that. sweet. I laugh like an idiot all the time, amuse myself during the day taking care of stuff (renovations, pay bills, etc)

My life, my happiness, my sense of humor, and general sense of well being is directly tied to MJ.
Its like it just adds something almost on a chemical level in my brain, even my wife after us being together for 10 years says I am not the same person when I am not using MJ. And the person she really loves is the guy with the pot habit. Now although she refers to my pot as my anger management meds, she says finds me more of a complete person when I'm stoned, more loving, more considerate, even more funny & witty.

definealty a calmer person as well.

Since discovering vaping, I no longer have to worry about my health so much.( although I do forget a lot of shit.)
Just need to work on a constant affordable supply & life would be groovy.

Since discovering this site in particular, and a few others. I have decided to embrace my inner stoner & have at it.

I'm ok with it, my wife (unbelieveably) is ok with it. It makes me happy, therfore it makes her happy. its all good.

fuck the haters, because thats what dawned on me.

It makes me happy, .............and all we ever strive for is to be happy.
I can function, live my life & love my wife. I used to think that MJ was robbing me of a normal life, and I was a dirty loser stoner.

Its only now I am starting realise what MJ has given me, and am totally blown away by what else it has to offer others as well from a health POV.

thankyou FC, this site has changed my life, finding others who are mature adults who use MJ for many differnet reasons and frequency, has made me feel a bit more normal.
This site & its members has helped me embrace my inner stoner.

So, in order to answer the question.
Vape as much as it takes to make you happy, cause lifes too short not to be happy as much as possible.
(In my case, vaping 24/7 makes me happy, very happy)

I enjoy the direction this threads taking

I vape every day after work, and all day whenever I can !
Addicted... Yes.... worried..... no .
Vaping is very clean and my lungs never felt better.
As to defining or qualifying the actual high,
Many years ago I told or heard someone say,
"Getting high is like looking at color T.V. while
Not being high is just black and white."
I now would say weed is like H D T.V.
It also helps in anger management !

I do hate and worry about the legal side
of weed and all the sneaking around like a
double agent. I wish that we all could come
out of the closet.

dorkus_molorkus said:

I vape so all them other muthafuckers can live, otherwise I'd go all postal on their asses.

God damn cut me off in traffic cocksucker! Its a good thing for you that I just vaped 1-1.2gr of some dank shit & am too fucked up to come & try to remember why I'm so pissed off with you..........
Hey you gonna eat that cheeseburger bro??



but this is the real reason,

copied & pasted from another thread here that I'm too baked to work out how to link it.
The question here was '' is there any reason why i shouldnt vape all day, everyday?''
this was my reply.......


I have been stoned since I was 18 yo & Im 40 now. If I am to be totally honest, I was hopelssly addicted to MJ from the very beginning. I will toke up the second my eyes open and stop when I go to sleep.

I have tried many times over the last 20years to give up, I have hidden my habit mostly. I am not really a social smoker, I do my thing quietly & discreetly on my own. My wife (before she was my wife), made it very clear that she didnt approve of my pot use. When I met her I was in a giving up stage, but then as we spent time together the MJ crept its way back in my life.

I have been a wake n baker for all that time. And my fav method of delivery was gravity/ bucket bong. 4-6 of them 1st thing in the morning forever was the norm & if I could get away with it, I would bong on all day, all night. at work, at my mums, in the car before the movies or restaurant, and then after the movies or restaurant.
I took my drivers test stoned, got my forklift ticket stoned, got married, went to all my job interviews stoned, managed 20+ people on a day to day basis, hired, fired, ran my own business, you name it, always stoned, all the time.

I have tried to give up for my health, I have tried to give up for my wallet, I have tried to give up for my self esteem (by not being a drug addict & despised being a slave to a substance), I have tried to give up cause I was sick of it being difficult to obtain & getting ripped off, and making me feel like a drug addict when I would run around like a fuckwit in order to score.

my worst nightmare is a T-break

But it has come to dawn on me & my wife, that I have never tried to give up for me.
Because I dont want to.............. I love it, I just love being stoned, all the time. Sure the motivation thing always needs work, but other than that. sweet. I laugh like an idiot all the time, amuse myself during the day taking care of stuff (renovations, pay bills, etc)

My life, my happiness, my sense of humor, and general sense of well being is directly tied to MJ.
Its like it just adds something almost on a chemical level in my brain, even my wife after us being together for 10 years says I am not the same person when I am not using MJ. And the person she really loves is the guy with the pot habit. Now although she refers to my pot as my anger management meds, she says finds me more of a complete person when I'm stoned, more loving, more considerate, even more funny & witty.

definealty a calmer person as well.

Since discovering vaping, I no longer have to worry about my health so much.( although I do forget a lot of shit.)
Just need to work on a constant affordable supply & life would be groovy.

Since discovering this site in particular, and a few others. I have decided to embrace my inner stoner & have at it.

I'm ok with it, my wife (unbelieveably) is ok with it. It makes me happy, therfore it makes her happy. its all good.

fuck the haters, because thats what dawned on me.

It makes me happy, .............and all we ever strive for is to be happy.
I can function, live my life & love my wife. I used to think that MJ was robbing me of a normal life, and I was a dirty loser stoner.

Its only now I am starting realise what MJ has given me, and am totally blown away by what else it has to offer others as well from a health POV.

thankyou FC, this site has changed my life, finding others who are mature adults who use MJ for many differnet reasons and frequency, has made me feel a bit more normal.
This site & its members has helped me embrace my inner stoner.

So, in order to answer the question.
Vape as much as it takes to make you happy, cause lifes too short not to be happy as much as possible.
(In my case, vaping 24/7 makes me happy, very happy)

Click to expand...

Dude. Wow.
I'm going to have to copy and paste, and straight plagairize parts of your post as theyre reflective of my own experiences but worded in a manner that just makes sense to anyone who reads it.
I'll try to give you credit when i do. My gf WILL HAVE TO read this.

My turn!

I use cannabis for a whole mess of reasons
I choose to vaporize over smoking because I have a few lung diseases.
I have:
-Bronchitis Obliterans
-COPD
-Emphysema
-and Asthma
The bronchitis obliterans is a terminal lung disease responsible for most of my other problems it causes: - -lots of aches and pains
-other pains due to medical treatment
-I have a hard time gaining weight due to my body spending most of is resources on best using the little amount of oxygen I breath in. (I am 5' 7", 95lbs)
-Occasional depression comes with having a terminal disease

I also use it for its anti inflammatory properties. I use cannabis to replace a medicine I am commonly prescribed for anti inflammatory, that unfortunately makes me the least friendly emotional person in the world.

And last but not least, recreational, for boredom, thinking, and enhancing other experiences(mainly video games ).

I could of forgotten something, but moral of the story is cannabis solves a whole mess of problems for me and makes my life much more enjoyable.

I also have a crazy theory that it may be stopping my bronchitis obliterans from getting worse. (The disease has no cure and slowly renders my lungs useless by producing scar tissue and things of the like, I will require a transplant when it gets worse, I am currently at 17% lung capacity)

Edit: Forgot about difficulties sleeping and staying asleep.

Kudos if you read this wall of text!

I get vaped because it is difficult for me to sleep; weed kills the nightmares.

Many reasons.
Primarily relaxation and for treatment of crohns disease. Effective herb for sleep too.
I love it and I love it more since transitioned to vaporizing a couple years ago. I love kind buds.

With all due respect - "why are there times i'm not vaping!"

Awesome thread Irie! Thanks...

Im hoping the thread stays alive...

Awesome thread, I relate to some of these posts a lot...

Obviously the #1 reason I not only vape but get high in general is cos it's just incredibly fun and it allows me to appreciate things, life in general, on a totally different level than I would sober. I don't really drink alcohol anymore, but I need something to break up the monotony and the stress/negative feelings that can sometimes build up after a few weeks of harsh (or even just mundane) sober reality. If I didn't do weed I would legitimately need to be on antidepressants or something as I would lose my fucking mind haha. I don't do it that much (well it varies, sometimes I do it several times a week, sometimes I won't do it for a month or two) but it always balances me out and gives me a "reality check" of sorts, and 99% of the time I feel way better in general for days after getting high, probably as a result of relieving any mental and physical tension, stress, and also getting a really solid sleep, though admittedly vaping isn't quite as good as smoking in that regard (but better in pretty much every other way haha)

Anything I do while high becomes this amazing and unique experience that will be with me for the rest of my life. Like say I listen to a certain album through my headphones after vaping or smoking, as long as it's good music that I would normally like, there's a good chance it will be absolutely mindblowing while high and will leave such an impression on my mind in that head space that even when I listen to the same music again when I'm NOT high, I will still be able to appreciate it on that level, if that makes sense. Whether it's music I never heard before or albums I've heard 1000 times, hearing them for the first time while stoned is like a totally different experience and certain songs I'll hear high will just stick with me in my mind and soul for literally months after I hear them. It's also cool with music (or other stuff like video games or whatever) that you've heard at least once but didn't fully get into, sometimes I'll listen to something like that after getting high and I suddenly "get it" on this completely different level without needing to make any effort, it's hard to really put into words I guess... Same for my own music (I make beats mostly), I'll listen to something of mine that I'd heard 100 times and it'll be like I'm hearing it for the first time, and it's hugely inspiring in a sense of "Hmm, I could actually make something really fucking good one day". One thing that is a little disappointing though sometimes when I get super inspired all of a sudden like that, I'll get excited as fuck and be like "I'm gonna make the dopest beat ever right now" and it never works out like that... I only make good shit when I'm not trying or expecting to haha. Another thing is that flaws in my own shit stick out 100 times more when I listen to it high, like if I make a beat that I otherwise like but the snare or whatever sounds bad in one way or another it will grate on me so much to the point where I want to go and fix it at that very moment, it feels like it ruins the entire thing but usually it's probably exaggerated alot in my mind.

As for why I vape in particular: Only started in like September last year but I really love it. First I got a Vapor Genie which I still use and love but I also have an MFLB, which I use more often now. Though if I use the MFLB for like a month straight it will stop getting me high properly and using the VG will be way more effective for a while, and vice versa, so it's great to have the two really portable and efficent options. I went like 6 months without smoking once after I got into vaping, but when I did decide to smoke some in like late March, it was really amazing after not doing it for so long. But then when I smoked again the next day, it was good but nowhere near as good as before, and vaping generally gives me a way more euphoric high than smoking so I vape like 90% of the time. One thing with smoking though is that it definitely balances me out mentally more than vaping, I always feel better mentally for several days after getting high whether vaping or smoking, but something about smoking just seems to help me more in that regard, maybe it's the extra CBD or something. Though at the same time, that only applies if I haven't smoked in a good while, like at least a week or two, if I smoked 2 or 3 days in a row it would stop having that positive bonus effect for me.

Vaping is way more convenient, and generally more pleasant (though I still enjoy smoking if it's really nice herb) as far as the actual process of consuming the herb goes... I haven't smoked in my bedroom since I was like 16 but I can easily vape anywhere I want without it being a problem, especially with the MFLB. And as I mentioned before, the actual high tends to be amazing (unless I do it too often, then it starts to get terribly dull if I don't switch up either the implement or the strain) and a lot more like the old school highs you'd get from smoking as a teenager. I get less anxious and paranoid from vaping, generally speaking, if I smoke I will be afraid to even open my front door for like an hour, let alone go outside... but with vaping I feel high as fuck without being in a completely different world like I sometimes would be after smoking. One slight downside with vaping compared to smoking is that the high from vaping lasts a long time but the time passes by really quickly, so like 5-6 hours will pass by all of a sudden and then I just feel a bit burnt out, and not really high anymore but not really as chilled as I'd be after the smoking high had mostly worn off. It's not like that unless I got REALLY high to begin with though, like if I just got a moderate buzz it would just wear off and I'd feel pretty normal.

It's been about 10-11 days since I last got high, staying at my parent's house since last weekend, they're going overseas with the rest of my family in like 3 days and I'll get their place to myself for 9-10 days which should be insanely awesome, especially after getting some new shit finally after doing the same strain for almost a year... can't wait to try that shit, only thing is it's sticky as fuck and I think it'll be a struggle to grind to the right consistency, especially in my grinder which hasn't worked very well ever since I cleaned it with some iso a couple of months ago...

I get vaped all day every day for one simple reason...I LOVE to be stoned...bottom line

Bipola said:

I always feel better mentally for several days after getting high whether vaping or smoking, but something about smoking just seems to help me more in that regard, maybe it's the extra CBD or something.

Click to expand...

Great post man I really related to some of your statements about having music 'click' or being able to analyze something from a different angle. In response to what's quoted above have you tried eating your ABV sometimes I'll eat about a gram before bed after a meal. I find it really helps get those CBDs in for pain relief or sleep.

I mostly vape to relax at the end of the week, since school is pretty busy and and life can get extremely stressful and hectic trying to keep up with the expectations of my field of study.