Fuck you, you goddam shit security.
I go to this bar (I never go to bars) security asks for ID I provide. He says he needs more ID because he doesn't believe the one I have I real, so I literally toss about 6 different cards with my name on it on the table because I'm already frustrated. He tells me to stop disrespecting him. Anyway, I get into the bar ... and then it begins.
I go to the bathroom ... because I had to go to the bathroom. Not that strange right? Security guard (same one) comes in and starts harassing me. Tells me I no doubt have something on me. So I ask "what exactly do you think I have on me" "oh anything man, people talk, people in this bar talk and we know. We know you have something"
A few back and forth go by and he stars telling me I'm selling blow. I've literally never even seen that stuff in person ... I'm a nerdy gamer kid who still loves spongebob and happens to vape weed, so this is getting a bit ridiculous for me. He threatens to call "the 4 cops outside" (who by the way, I heard him complaining about earlier because he hated cops ... his bluff is more obvious than his triple chin), says he's going to tell them to do a full pat down if I don't give him blow to flush down the toilet. I'm pretty appalled by this point spending 5 minutes in a bathroom with someone who looks like the criminal version of my favorite comedian Fluffy. I tell him to call them, that I wouldn't let them touch me, and he's wasting everyone's time for the sake of wasting it. He says Ok and lets me leave the bathroom.
I'm playing pool now ... and the guy starts doing rounds against me and brushes his hand against my pocket and says "oh sorry man". You serious? You really just try to do a drive by pat down or are you just happy to see me?
30 minutes goes by. A man approaches me. (Given the circumstances ... and the fact NO ONE ever approaches me and my innocence... I know what he's about to do) starts telling me he knows me. I'm like no no no no no no go away I'm not doing this go away this is getting ridiculous. "Nah man i know you I went to school with you ... got any blow?" I'm like duuuuuude seriously stop this shit this is absurd! So he's like man I know people here I know you here I saw you walk into that bathroom I know you sell blow.
So after telling him to fuck of for 5 minutes I see him reconvene with the security guard and telling him what I said. I approached the man. "Hey man I saw you talking to that security guard ... Kinda weird after trying to buy drugs from me" (at this point I'm just playing with them) "nah nah man nah never man nah I wasn't talkin to no security guard nah man I just want some Coke man nah nah".
Then the guy pretends to get money from the ATM directly behind us as he listens to our convo. He was literally at the ATM for 5 minutes and never got cash out, just listening. We told the bartenders this entire situation about the security and his little puppet toy, told them the puppet tried to buy Coke off me ... so as a joke and "fuck you" she tells the security guard to kick out the guy buying Coke from us ... but the security guard just pretends to give him a little pat down and talk ... obviously all BS.
It doesn't end there.
I'm trying to leave the bar in the Uber. I go out back. Uber is out front. I try to walk back in "ID please" ... dude ... you literally know me, you've been following me around with your thumb up your ass for the past 2 hours. "Why did you go to your car, huh? What did you get from there. More drugs? We saw you go in your car and get something". Dude ... I'm literally looking for my Uber (shows him app). Let me in to the front. So I go to the front of the bar and hop in my Uber. Uber driver tells me "dude security is like poking their head out of the door watching you leave." I'm like ya man they think I'm selling Coke or something when I just really wanna get home and play league of legends on the computer.
Oh well.
Funny thing is ... I had my Grasshopper on me the entire time.
Shoulda said you smelled weed buddy ... woulda had some traction on me, pal.
Long story short. Fuck security, fuck cops, fuck harsssment, fuck that bar, fuck everyone involved in that shit.
"
Anyway that tangled mess I caused myself was the story behind this post. So instead of being a bother and allowing it to fade on it's own, I wrote this cautionary post. Proofread your post in your head - mentally before typing it out. I guess.
Anywho.....
and we are not directly accountable. Yes, we are fairly in the clear. 
